I know this type of thread has probably been done before and has been done to death.

to me it is a toss up between animal house and caddyshack....with a close third place.....Christmas Vacation.


Caddyshack - So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one---big hitter, the Lama---long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

Animal house - "fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son"

Chrismas Vacation - a tie
"If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet I would be more surprised than I am right now"
"Can I get you something to eat, drink, drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?"

I got a couple:

Don't piss down my back and tell me its raining. Outlaw J.W

Who would eat 30 lunches? I'll tell you who, its that damn sasquash, thats who.

If peeing in your pants is cool consider me Miles Davis. Billy Madison

How can you kill woman and children? Its easy you just don't lead them so much. Full Metal Jacket

Just a few am sure I can go on for hours.

"We need a bigger boat!":D

" I thought you was dead"
" Not Hardly"

"I am your Father" 'nuff said :D

dying ain't much of a livin' boy

JW

we cant stop here!! this is bat country!!- fear and loathing

You lookin' at me?

Great idea. We could do a 'name that quote' thread. Couple of quick ones:

"What do you think this is, the army, where you shoot 'em from a mile away. You gotta walk right up to 'em and - Bada Bing! blow their brains out all over your nice ivy league suit. You're takin it too personal. Tom, this is business and he's takin' it personal." - Godfather

"You can'y fight here, this is the war room." - Dr. Strangelove

Inspector Reneau: "So Rick, why did you come to Casablanca?"
Bogart: "I came for the waters."
Inspector: "But Casablanca is in the desert!"
Bogart: "I was misinformed."

Rodney: "Oh, this is the ugliest hat in the world. What, do you get a free bowl of soup when you buy a hat."
Seeing Judge Smales wearing the exact same hat - "Oh, looks good on you, though." - Caddyshack

That Casablanca quote is priceless. Great movie. "Round up the usual suspects."

"Snakes....Why did it have to be Snakes?"

Say hello to my little friend Scarface
My wife , the f---ing junkie can't even make me a little baby Same movie

How am I funny, what makes me so f---ing funny, ect....
Goodfellas

Tons of lines from The Fan (Bobby Deniro)

A few more:

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning" - Apocalypse Now

Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx): "Remember boys, we're fighting for this woman's honor - which is probabaly more than she ever did!" - Duck Soup

"What we have here ....... is failure to communicate" - Cool Hand Luke

"I'll be back!" - Terminator

"He's gone under. He's gone under the boat. I think he's gone under the boat." - Jaws. I use this one on my boat all the time.

Will: "Do you like apples?"
Preppie: "Yeah."
Will: "Well, I got her number. How do you like them apples?"
- Good Will Hunting

Phil Berquist: You know you were right, Mitch. My life is a "do-over". It's time to get started. Mitch Robbins: I hope I can help. Ed Furillo: Now I'm gonna go home, and I'm gonna get Kim pregnant. Mitch Robbins: I hope I can help.

City Slickers

John Gustafson: Pop, I wish you'd try the low-fat bacon. Grandpa Gustafson: Well, you can wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which gets filled first.

Grumpier Old Men

"Chuck, Hold it a minute...Take live tunafish and feed em mayonaise.......call starkist"

Michael Keaton, Night Shift

"Hey, ya know what would look good on you?

Me!" - The Perfect Storm

"It is what it is" - TPS

" Kids now a days bring out everything , Radar, Sonar, Electric toothbrushes....Jesus H Christ"......Jaws

" This would be alot easier if you just stop resisting"...Dumb & Dumber

"My father taught me many things in this room.....he taught me, keep your friends close, but your enemies closer" Godfather II

"Coach you need one more, " " My teams on the floor"...Hoosiers

"Fifty bucks says the Smales kid picks his nose...
O.K., another fifty says he eats it!"

"Stand up now children, your father is passing", Tom's father to Atticus Finch's son and daughter in "To kill a Mockingbird."

Awesome, Awesome Movie!!!

"That....Thats the stuff that Dreams are made of"

The Maltese Falcon

Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country. GSP

from caddy shack.. al czervik,

"last time i saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it"

Here's a favorite Dirty Harry one: I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk?

"Hey if that dress had pockets you'd look like a pool table"

Rodney-Back to School

"Now I know why tigers eat their young"

"Hey you must have been something before electricity"

"Hey, did somebody step on a duck"

Rodney-Caddyshack

A Christmas Story:
" Daddy's gonna kill Ralphy "

Bring forth the holy hand grenade of Antioch.

What is you favorite color? holy grial

I feel like a little worm on a big Fu@#in hook. The Crow

Originally posted by TheSpecialist
Phil Berquist: You know you were right, Mitch. My life is a "do-over". It's time to get started. Mitch Robbins: I hope I can help. Ed Furillo: Now I'm gonna go home, and I'm gonna get Kim pregnant. Mitch Robbins: I hope I can help.

City Slickers

John Gustafson: Pop, I wish you'd try the low-fat bacon. Grandpa Gustafson: Well, you can wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which gets filled first.

Grumpier Old Men

Grumpy old men is a great movie,
Love the outakes shown at the end of the movie when Granpa Gufstafson says a different line every take

- Looks like Chucks going to take the skin boat to tuna town:laughs:
- Looks like Chucks going to take the log to the beaver:laughs:
theres more but i can't remember right now !
Ron

"if she craps out two dimes and a nickel, then you can worry"
-- grumpier old men

"my mistake 4 coffins"
-- clint eastwood, fist full of dollars

"when a guy is chasing a women naked with a knife and a hard on, i shoot the bastard, thats my policy"
-- clint eastwood, dirty harry

" did he shoot 5 or did he shoot six, the qustion is, you feelin' lucky punk? well do ya?"
--clint eastwood, dirty harry

"take my strong hand child"
--chris elliot, scary movie 2

"i believe you have my stapler"
--office space

"who the hell do you think you are? he thinks he's rambo!"
-- tango and cash (spoken to sylvester stallone)

i watch too many movies, ill stop now.



:jump1:

"Taxidermist gonna have a fit when he see what I brung him," Jaws

"Come on upstairs and help me sort me holy cards," Caddyshack

"It's a real shame when folks go throwin away a perfectly good white boy like that..."

"Gee Ricky, I'm sorry your mom blew up." Better off Dead

The 109 miles to Chicago quote from the Blues Brothers.

That's it for me right now.
Rick
PS-I know I've been working 12 hours a day, but why aren't the rest of you guys out fishing???!!!

Oh yeah,
"Hey Whitey, where's your hat"
and
"You like Fresca, don't you danny?"
Caddyshack

Originally posted by RickBomba
[B"Gee Ricky, I'm sorry your mom blew up." Better off Dead
[/B] I was just getting ready to type that.... Then there is the other line:
Monique- "He uses it as a chance to put his testicles all over me."
Lane - "His what?"
Monique - "How you say…uh, octopus…testicles."
Lane - "Tentacles "NT" Big difference. "
Monique - " Tentacles."

do you remember when i told you i'd kill you last... i lied.- arnold

classic.....
Part 1 (http://www.carlspackler.com/sounds/017.wav) Part 2 (http://www.carlspackler.com/sounds/018.wav)

Rick - also working 12 hr days. Which is why I have so much time to spend on typing here.

Thats right - I am one of the guys that spends all day in a 10x10 padded cell.

Thats not any good keeper we need to get you out there fishing.

"Do you like to watch Gladiator movies,Johnny?"..

if your going to talk about better off dead,

"WHERE'S MY TWO DOLLARS"

:D :laughs: :beat: :btu: :bl2:

"Excuse me while I whip this out"
"Want some beans Mr. Taggert?"
I love Blazing Saddles

those aren't pillows !!!

Originally posted by afterhours
those aren't pillows !!!

i miss john candy

Originally posted by RickBomba
"Taxidermist gonna have a fit when he see what I brung him," Jaws

"Come on upstairs and help me sort me holy cards," Caddyshack

"It's a real shame when folks go throwin away a perfectly good white boy like that..."

"Gee Ricky, I'm sorry your mom blew up." Better off Dead

The 109 miles to Chicago quote from the Blues Brothers.

That's it for me right now.
Rick
PS-I know I've been working 12 hours a day, but why aren't the rest of you guys out fishing???!!!

the white boy thing is from men at work right?

"your a stupid man, a stupid little man!"

"phrenologist determines and interprets the size of walts a##hole"

"rent a cops, i hate rent a cops too"

" liscense and registraion, chicken f###er"

" do you know how fast you were going meow?"

" i need a double king burger, its for a cop"

" does that look like spit?, awe f### it"

anyone know this one?

"rubbin son is racing"

" we looked like a monkey f###ing a football out there"

" ive seen it on espn, the coverage is excellent, you would be surprised at what you can pick up"

Redneck,
Let me tell you a little story...I started working at a restaurant in Framingham a few months ago...anyhow, lots of the brazillian guys there have worked for me before, and I speak very good Portugese.
Anyhow, while I was training, the GM had to give me performance evaluations every week.
I used to get excellent in the professionalism category every week. About five weeks into training, he gives me a poor in this category. Stymied, I ask him why???
His response...Well, I've noticed most of my hourly Brazillians, whom you know very well, have started referring to me as chickenf*^%$r or bearf&^%*$r. They never, ever called me something like that before, and I'm guessing you've got something to do with it.:rolleyes:
He was very right in this determination.
Car Ramrod!!!
Later,
Rick
PS- If you're looking for another funny one like that, try the Corndog Man, you can rent it at most Blockbusters.
Later,
Rick

Originally posted by redneck24
the white boy thing is from men at work right?

Better Off Dead and Men at Work both used that one.

Originally posted by redneck24
[B
anyone know this one?

"rubbin son is racing"

[/B]
Days of Thunder?

"We are here to protect Democracy....not practice it!!"

Originally posted by RickBomba
Redneck,
Let me tell you a little story...I started working at a restaurant in Framingham a few months ago...anyhow, lots of the brazillian guys there have worked for me before, and I speak very good Portugese.
Anyhow, while I was training, the GM had to give me performance evaluations every week.
I used to get excellent in the professionalism category every week. About five weeks into training, he gives me a poor in this category. Stymied, I ask him why???
His response...Well, I've noticed most of my hourly Brazillians, whom you know very well, have started referring to me as chickenf*^%$r or bearf&^%*$r. They never, ever called me something like that before, and I'm guessing you've got something to do with it.:rolleyes:
He was very right in this determination.
Car Ramrod!!!
Later,
Rick

thanks for the tip, ill check it out.
PS- If you're looking for another funny one like that, try the Corndog Man, you can rent it at most Blockbusters.
Later,
Rick :btu:

Originally posted by C-5 CC
"We are here to protect Democracy....not practice it!!"


watching it right now on TNT and I caught that quote also :)

" " ....Harpo Marx, A Day At The Races

Quint: "Here lies the body of Mary Lee ... died at the age of 103 ... for 15 years she kept her virginity ... not a bad record for this vicinity"
Hooper: "Uh ... I think that I'm familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass"

Big Joe: "Whadda ya doin'?"

Oddball: "Drinking some wine, eating some cheese, catching some rays"

Big Joe: "Why aren't you in the tank?"

Oddball: "Tank's broken, man"

Big Joe: "Why aren't you helpin' to fix it?"

Oddball: "Hey, I just drive 'em, I dunno what makes 'em work"

"Definitely an anti-social type. Woof, woof. That's my other dog imitation."

Crapgame to Big Joe and Kelly: "Make him a deal. Maybe the guy's a Republican".

Originally posted by Moose Nuckle
Quint: "Here lies the body of Mary Lee ... died at the age of 103 ... for 15 years she kept her virginity ... not a bad record for this vicinity"
Hooper: "Uh ... I think that I'm familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass"


"You're gonna need a bigger boat."

Baaaa dum.

Baaaa dum.

Ba dum - Ba dum, Ba dum - Ba dum, Ba dum - Ba dum

"I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk? "

"O Captain, my Captain. Who knows where that comes from? Anybody? Not a clue? It's from a poem by Walt Whitman about Mr. Abraham Lincoln. Now in this class you can either call me Mr. Keating, or if you're slightly more daring, O Captain my Captain. "

"You're gonna eat lightnin' and you're gonna crap thunder! "

Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss): You were on the Indianapolis?
Brody (Roy Scheider): What happened?
Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark would go for nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.
Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, bosom's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks ttook the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

Mike P,

That's "Kelly's Heroes".

"Make him a deal"
"What kind of a deal?"
"A 'deal' deal"

"Moriarty - Always with the negative waves!"

Originally posted by Moose Nuckle
Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss): You were on the Indianapolis?
Brody (Roy Scheider): What happened?
Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark would go for nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.
Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, bosom's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks ttook the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.


Fred,
I think you have Way too much time on you're hands:laughs: :laughs: :laughs:
Can you quote the whole movie ?

Got another

"You can't kill me, I'm already dead"

(Charles Manson) Helter Skelter

Originally posted by rexhamer
Mike P,

That's "Kelly's Heroes".

"Make him a deal"
"What kind of a deal?"
"A 'deal' deal"

"Moriarty - Always with the negative waves!"

Oddball (glassing the bridge): "It's still up"

5 seconds later: "No it ain't. See what those negative waves did, Moriarty?"

Moriarty: "That ain't fair. I've been havin' nuttin but boo-ti-ful thoughts about that bridge since we left"

As they drive away on the Panzer:

Moriarty: "Oddball, I could see trading for the uniforms, but why'd ya have to go and buy this tank? It's a piece of junk"

Oddball: "It's a mother beautiful tank"

Moriarty: "It's a piece of junk. The fuel system leaks all over the place. It's a piece of JUNK!!"

Oddball: "Always with the negative waves, Moriarty, always the negative waves"

Moriarty: "Crap"

"The sea is calm you said. Peaceful. Calm above, but below a world of gliding monsters preying on their fellows. Murderers, all of them. Only the strongest teeth survive. And who's to tell me it's any different here on board, or yonder on dry land?"


Any Guesses??

One of my Personal Favorites

B A Bay
B E Bee
B I Bickie Bi B O Bo
Bickie Bi Bo
B U Bu
Bickie Bi Bo Bu

Curly is a dope......

The Three Stooges. Ok, When I nod my head you hit it.

Moe, Larry the cheese.
Moe, Larry the cheese.
Why do you eat so much cheese?
Ah, my father was a rat.

Originally posted by jugstah
"I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk? "

"O Captain, my Captain. Who knows where that comes from? Anybody? Not a clue? It's from a poem by Walt Whitman about Mr. Abraham Lincoln. Now in this class you can either call me Mr. Keating, or if you're slightly more daring, O Captain my Captain. "

"You're gonna eat lightnin' and you're gonna crap thunder! "



[B] DING-DING-DING [?B] - We have a winner. At least in my opinion. that is the #1 dialog of all times. That was and is one of the most intense and chilling monolgues I have ever heard and ever wish to hear. Reading it here doesn't do it justice. In the movie is was absolutely perfect. Moments before, there is joy, dirnking, singing having fun. Trading stories about scars. Then the moments slows and Quin delivers this monolgue in an absolutly perfect delivery. I do not think this monolgue could have been delievered any better by any other actor - bar none.

And I replied to the wrong post.

That last post was suppose to be about Quinn's delivery of the hiroshima bomb.


I swear that is what I replied too....JohnR - any chance you are having problems with the site?

Originally posted by afterhours
do you remember when i told you i'd kill you last... i lied.- arnold

as well as " I let him go."

This house is sho gone crazy!

"Let's Pluck him and see if he's ripe"

It's a Cinderalla Story!

Noonan....nnnnnnooonan

Caddyshack

Speaking of Arnold...how bout

"Please dont disturb my friend, he's dead tired."

Sly Stallone

" My ring's outside."

" I was wondering if you wouldn't mind marrying me too much"

Chevy Chase

" Real tomato ketchup Eddie?" D.Quaid ( Eddie ) "Nothing but the best!!"


and the all time best

" You'll shoot your eye out" from Christmas story"

Favorite Stooges lines could have its own thread.

1) "I seen my duty and I done it!"

2) "You know - my mother and your mother were both mothers."

3) " Well the first shell goes in there, and it goes around and around....and whaoooooo...and it comes out there."

4) Moe: "Where are the tools?"
Larry: "What tools?"
Moe: "The tools we've been using for the last ten years!"
Larry: "Oh, those tools!"

5) Moe: "Hey, were you wearing a pink carnation?"
Curley: "No."
Moe: "Then I think I just cut your ear off."

My favorite:
6) The Stooges are Yankee spies (Duck, Dodge & Hide) at the Confederate general's house. After Moe writes down the secret information on a piece of paper, Curley uses that paper to roll a handmade cigarette. But the cigarette bursts into flames in Curley's hand.

Moe, glaring at Curley: "Do you know what that was?"
Curley: "HOT?"

Originally posted by rexhamer
Favorite Stooges lines could have its own thread.



Good idea

My favorite line was the episode where they were the Wrong Brothers. They were in the plane and Moe and Curly are looking for the Lever, Larry says:

"Are you two going Steady"

Cracks me up every time

Originally posted by blackeye
"Excuse me while I whip this out"
"Want some beans Mr. Taggert?"
I love Blazing Saddles

"Whew that sure was close. We dang near lost a $400 push cart."

Originally posted by HighTide
This house is sho gone crazy!


hightide- you nailed it!!!

Okay, I realize to most of society these are the worst movies ever, but they're my faves:D

"It take respec' to get respec'" - cedric in Brarbershop

"Daddy would you like some sausage?"- Gord in Freddy Got Fingered

"He's a molester... he's a CHIIIIIILD MOLESTER! AHHH!"- Gord, to his Dad in the psychiatrist office

"Doy!"- Junior in Problem Child... the creation of one of the best words in the English language