View Full Version : u know your a redneck when


capesams
02-24-2005, 10:38 PM
u put on brand new undies thinking that if u leave the plastic bag on that they came in they'll stay cleaner longer:laughs:

Nebe
02-24-2005, 10:42 PM
you old Phart.... those were depends. :eek:

Karl F
02-25-2005, 01:36 PM
new unders, CS?
u musta come inta some money :confused:
:hihi:

MAC
02-25-2005, 05:44 PM
Originally posted by Karl F
new unders, CS?
u musta come inta some money :confused:
:hihi:

No, momma is away and he didn't know how to run the washing machine:laughs: :laughs: :laughs:

Raven
02-26-2005, 07:12 AM
em paw dent ......to much.

and rolland knows your Mama....

they seel -> boiled peanuts up yonder

theres a confederate flag on your truck

and you wear camo clothes to church





i reckin :huh:

redneck24
02-27-2005, 07:34 AM
dammit cs, you gave away my secret:tooth:

missing link
02-27-2005, 08:18 AM
If you consider a six pack and a bug zapper quality entertainment--- Link sr.:cool:

ThrowingTimber
02-27-2005, 01:03 PM
If your lawyer begins his dialog with the jury with: "Y'all aint goin' tah beleive this...."

beachwalker
02-27-2005, 02:36 PM
you don't understand why people use the fairy stick

Raven
02-27-2005, 04:05 PM
when you catch a fish.....

Van
02-28-2005, 04:28 PM
WHEN.......

You go to family reunions to meet women....

Raven
02-28-2005, 04:33 PM
shine
and it ain't from the sun.

afterhours
03-01-2005, 08:01 AM
...you and your wife have the same grandma.

whiplash
03-01-2005, 05:53 PM
What do you call a red neck that raises goats and pigs?


scroll down




















Bisexual yehaaaaaaaaaw:happy:

tynan19
03-01-2005, 08:22 PM
When you are mowing your lawn and you find a car.

Van
03-02-2005, 08:21 AM
If you've ever climbed a water tower to defend
your sister's honor.

GregK
03-02-2005, 11:28 AM
when you walk your son to school because your in the same grade

FishermanTim
03-02-2005, 11:45 AM
1.) You've had to skip school because of jury duty.

2.) More than one relative has met their makers just after saying "Now watch this...."

3.) Any pf your family was a "guest" on "COPS", and you taped it for the neighbors.

4.) You save for your kids' college fund a 6 pack at a time.

5.) If a hairdo was ever distroyed by a ceiling fan in your (mobile) home.

6.) If she's your Grandma, your Mother and your wife.

MAC
03-02-2005, 12:14 PM
After just putting in a fresh chaw your wife calls you for dinner. You take the chaw out and place it on the bench knowing it will still be good when ya get back:tooth:

capesams
03-02-2005, 04:55 PM
:eek: that one's reel life :err: :D

Vermonter
03-07-2005, 12:59 AM
.....you think a volvo is part of the female anatomy.

fishaholic18
03-07-2005, 01:11 AM
you were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 45’s.

your front porch collapses and four dogs get killed.

that billboard that says, “Say No To Crack” reminds you to pull up your jeans.

you go to your family reunions looking for a date.

fishaholic18
03-07-2005, 01:14 AM
you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin’ contest.

your favorite entree is Spam barbecued on the grill.

your idea of high-quality entertainment is a six-pack and a bug-zapper.

you’ve ever valet parked a snow plow.

you’ve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your truck.

you have a Bud Light pool-table light hanging over your dining room table.

you ask the preacher, “How’s it hanging?”

Raven
03-09-2005, 09:49 AM
your driveways covered with them thar cans to bee rice-cicled

Surfpirate
03-14-2005, 10:45 PM
... if you ever brought a beer into a job interview.

... if you refer to the sixth grade as your senior year.

... if the directions to your house include "turn off the paved road"

...if you ever used your belt buckle as a second form of identification.

Iwannakeeper
03-15-2005, 05:32 AM
.....if your momma doesn't take the marlboro from her lips before telling the statie to kiss her A$$


My favorite one has already been said - ...you have ever taken a beer to a job interview......:rotf2: :rotf3: :buds:

Iwannakeeper
03-15-2005, 06:01 AM
....you've ever been too drunk to fish.....

I think I can name a few people for that one


and I got some help on some of these other ones.


.....you've ever brought a fishing pole to seaworld
.....you think the last words to the star spangled banner is "Gentlemen Start your Engines...."
.....your family tree doesn't branch
.....your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.......
.....the jack-o-latern has more teeth than your wife.....
......you've ever climbed a water town to defend your sisters honor....
......you met your wife by reading.....for a good time.....
.......you've ever used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.....
.....you own a homemade fur coat
.....your wife has ever said, come move this transmission, I need to take a bath
.....you wonder how service stations get their bathrooms so clean
....you've ever been to a custody hearing over a hunting dog
.....you've ever been banned by a zoo for disturbing the monkeys
....your childs first words are "Attention K-Mart Shoppers!!!"
.....your mother has ever been arrested at a high school sporting event
.... your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board
....your favorite work of art is painted on Velvet

Iwannakeeper
03-15-2005, 06:25 AM
... You've ever worn a tube top to a wedding.
....you've ever financed a tattoo - sorry guys
... you owe the taxidermist more than your annual income
... Skoal sends you a Christmas Card
... your wife has a beer belly - and you find it attractive
... you've been fired from a construction job because of your appearance
...You are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.
....you've ever been blacklisted by a bowling alley
...if the highlight of the family reunion was your sister first live nude dancing performance.
...if you have Pabst Blue Ribbon on tap in your bathroom
...if you know how many bales of hay your car can hold
....if you have a toothpick in you mouth in wedding photos
....you've ever hit a speed bump and lost 1/2 of all possessions
...if you have grease under your toe nails.

hunan
03-15-2005, 11:31 AM
if you sign your plugs REDNECK. hi, i'm daryl this is my brother daryl and my other brother daryl.