An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child, he said. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my Mother's birthday; it is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me, under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

"From the top of my head down to my waist I have nothing to declare."

The official thought this answer was strange, so he asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next!

That's pretty good.

As an aside...a few years ago I had an oval shaped, footed, silver hinged jewelry box in my carry on bag. It was an antique from my grandmother's estate. I didn't think anything of it until they asked what was in my bag.

I looked around at the screen and on the x-ray it looked EXACTLY like a hand grenade!

-spence