love the alligator story!!!;)

Took my wife fishin once. She fell a sleep in the car,wouldn't cut bait, won't clean fish,heck...she doesn't even eat fish..........I found her in Japan but she's a NH native..... That explains the fish thing......She's about as natural as they come,just the way I like it

What kind of jokes are you partial to, Goose?

awwww! (sniff) how sweet!;)

I will fillet, bait, or whatever else.....but DONT make me GUT IT!!!!too many organs make me sick to my stomach!!! (dont ask why....I cant figure it out....just is!!!)

really good jokes, sorry it takes me soooo darn long to get back to u guy's Give me time I'll try and give u some

well we didnt hit 130 by 11....sorry!!

make it snappy goose! LOL

wow....I am gonna check to see how many posts were up to here....

Here you go Goose:

''I just got a new set of golf clubs for my wife!''
''Great trade!''
*******************

A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. He was driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!"

The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."

"Forget it, man," said his partner, "you don't stand a snowball's chance in hell of hitting her from here!"
*****************

It's Saturday morning and Bob's just about to set off on a round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So Bob heads back to the clubhouse and phones home.
"Hello?" says a little girl's voice.

"Hi, honey, it's Daddy," says Bob. "Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank."

After a brief pause, Bob says, "But you haven't got an Uncle Frank, honey!"

"Yes, I do, and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy!"

"Okay, then. Here's what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout in to Mommy and Uncle Frank that my car's just pulled up outside the house."

"Okay, Daddy!" A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. "Well, I did what you said, Daddy."

"And what happened?"

"Well, Mommy jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went out the front window and now she's all dead."

"Oh, my God! What about Uncle Frank?"

"He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too, and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool. But he must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he's dead too."

There is a long pause.

"Swimming pool? Is this 854-7039?"

I'm sticking it out until 130!!!!!

how do you circumcize a red neck?? kick his sister in the jaw

Gotta be there soon - must get sleep.....

1927!!!I would suggest hittin 2000 but I dont know if I can hold out much longer.....dont have it in me tonite I guess!

Me either - when are we hitting 130!?!?!?!?!?

Okay, if this doesn't do it I give up!!!!

how do you know when its really cold?? when a politician has his hands in his own pockets

beats me...thought we'd be there by now!!

Now I'm just pissed - 130 here we come!!

bad jokes huh

yep....thats pretty cold! LOL

where you from goose?

Thank goodness!! In the immortal words of Donny and Marie Osmond - "Goodnight Everybody!!!"


:beat:

she's getting fired up now!!!!:cool: :D :o

why are lawyers buried 60ft under??? because deep down there good people

HA!HA! that one was good!

we taking this to 2000?????????

I will if you will.....

but your little goose fingers are gonna have to type faster than that LOL

sounds good ta me

only 54 more to go!:rolleyes:

gotta learn to type with two instead of one

hey I type with two.....one of the left and one on the right!!!!!

I wonder if there is such a thing as a hunt and peck typing competition???? I bet I would have a good chance at winning that!!!