Striper Talk Striped Bass Fishing, Surfcasting, Boating - Anyone up for a swim in the Amazon?

ah, that's NUTTIN.

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Candiru or candirú (also canero, toothpick fish, or willy fish) refers to parasitic freshwater catfish of a number of genera in the family Trichomycteridae. They are found in the Amazon River and have a reputation among the natives as the most feared fish in its waters, even over the piranha....

While the members of the subfamily Vandelliinae feed on blood, members of Stegophilinae may feed on scales, mucus, or carrion.[6]

This fish is feared to attack humans and swim into an orifice (the vagina, anus, or even the penis—and deep into the urethra).[4] Because of spines protruding from the fish, it is almost impossible to remove except through surgery.[7] The fish locates its host by following a water flow to its source and thus urinating while bathing increases the chance of a candiru homing in on a human urethra. Natives have also been known to bathe facing the current, as doing so would decrease the chances of the organism lodging itself in the rectum.[citation needed] Other orifices such as the penis or vagina are covered up with the use of hands.

Though there have been documented candiru attacks on humans[citation needed], there is no evidence the fish can survive once inside a human. A traditional cure involves the use of two plants, the Jagua plant (Genipa americana) and the Buitach apple which are inserted (or their extract in the case of tight spaces) into the affected area. In theory, these two plants together will kill and then dissolve the fish. More often, infection causes shock and death in the victim before the candiru can be removed.

A well-circulated myth is that the candiru is capable of swimming up the stream of urine in mid-air to a victim standing on shore or a boat. This is physically impossible as the maximum swimming velocity of the fish is opposed by the downward velocity of the urine stream, and the further impossible act of the 5-14 mm wide fish maintaining position and thrust within a 2–7 mm wide column of fluid. They are also probably not attracted to urine as commonly thought.[4]