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-   -   Illegals coming into the USA question (http://www.striped-bass.com/Stripertalk/showthread.php?t=60034)

Saltheart 10-21-2009 02:12 PM

Illegals coming into the USA question
 
In keeping with some of the reduculous stuff being tossed around in here , I have a serious question for the intellectuals who haunt this forum.

People who come from Mexico or Cuba or guatemala , etc without passports or some form of documentation are illegal aliens.

Now suppose we get visitors from another planet. Aren't they also illegal aliens and therefore subject to arrest but more likely entitled to free schooling and medical care and welfare etc?

Also where does one find bilingual extraterrestrial teachers to teach these off planet illegals in school? Think about it! My guess is a teacher who is bilngual in english and Martian demands quite a high salary and the Venutian bilinguals want 6 figures minimum. Its a real dilemna.

These kind of questions really keep me awake at night.

RIJIMMY 10-21-2009 02:41 PM

simple answer - since we are currently in a democratic administration, the aliens from another planet will be forced to rely on the government for all basic needs, thus they will owe their survival to the government. All aliens will then be legalized and this will ensure that the continue to vote for the democratic party that supplies them their basic necessities.

Raven 10-21-2009 03:44 PM

if they can get here they can also leave just as easy

and they will have trade opportunities with the advanced technology

they will be able to speak English

PRBuzz 10-21-2009 04:28 PM

If they can get here obviously they are more technologically advanced than we mere humans and just as likely to have developed a Universal Translator ( Universal translator - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) so understanding English or any other Earthly language will not be a problem.

They obviously will be placed under government control and likely given orange jump suits and maybe a home in Guantanamo Bay since those residents are currently vacating the facility (i think Obama said he was closing the first day of office?). Longer term they would be assimilated into one or more societies found on Earth.

As for relying on government handouts, they will likely come bearing some form of valuable currency (don't stay focused on things such as the dollar) for barter that will far exceed the value of any currency on Earth, remember the movie "The Day the Earth Stood Still" relied on diamonds?

MAC 10-21-2009 04:44 PM

My guess is if an alien life form came here we wouldn't be on top of the food chain anymore. We may even be on the menu.

Joe 10-21-2009 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saltheart (Post 718874)
In keeping with some of the reduculous stuff being tossed around in here , I have a serious question for the intellectuals who haunt this forum.

You might want to issue a list of whom you would like to respond rather than use the term "intellectuals."
Intellectualism has negative connotations for those whom Sara Palin so aptly described in coded language as, "hard-working Americans."

Joe 10-21-2009 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RIJIMMY (Post 718879)
simple answer - since we are currently in a democratic administration, the aliens from another planet will be forced to rely on the government for all basic needs, thus they will owe their survival to the government. All aliens will then be legalized and this will ensure that the continue to vote for the democratic party that supplies them their basic necessities.

No way they'd go on the dole - they would have boundless opportunities for book deals: The Alien's Guide To The Universe, The Complete Idiot's Guide To Interstellar Travel, then they could follow that up with couple of sexual memoirs of their relationships with Shirley MacLaine and a shocker about a threesome the pilot had with Mackenzie & Papa John Phillips.

Saltheart 10-21-2009 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe (Post 718967)
You might want to issue a list of whom you would like to respond rather than use the term "intellectuals."
Intellectualism has negative connotations for those whom Sara Palin so aptly described in coded language as, "hard-working Americans."

"intellectuals".....

When fishing , I choose my bait wisely! :devil: :)

Raven 10-22-2009 05:18 AM

i don't work hard
 
i work SMART

for i am an intellectual :rotflmao:

Raven 10-22-2009 05:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MAC (Post 718924)
My guess is if an alien life form came here we wouldn't be on top of the food chain anymore. We may even be on the menu.

:think: ooooOOOO0000 "it's a cookbook" recipe for man

RIJIMMY 10-22-2009 07:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe (Post 718979)
No way they'd go on the dole - they would have boundless opportunities for book deals: The Alien's Guide To The Universe, The Complete Idiot's Guide To Interstellar Travel, then they could follow that up with couple of sexual memoirs of their relationships with Shirley MacLaine and a shocker about a threesome the pilot had with Mackenzie & Papa John Phillips.

the democrats have diminished many great cultures and forced them to be reliant on the government, why would this be any different.

Joe 10-22-2009 08:23 AM

Righto. Culture and republicanism go hand-in-hand. Now somebody cover up the naughty parts of the Justice Sculpture so Mr. Ashcroft can speak without blushing.

RIJIMMY 10-22-2009 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe (Post 719022)
Righto. Culture and republicanism go hand-in-hand. Now somebody cover up the naughty parts of the Justice Sculpture so Mr. Ashcroft can speak without blushing.

who said anything about republicans?

Saltheart 10-22-2009 11:32 AM

I think these aliens would be friendly little buggers who would give us cures for all disease and also the technology to generate unlimited energy using renewable resources. They would never bomb us or try to force their beliefs on us. They would all be educated creatures and as we know educated beings never attempt to force their ideals on others by using force.

They would also be all different colors like pink and yellow and lavender and Mauve and powder blue and love each other no matter what color they were. I would imaging that when we cook them the yellow ones would taste like chicken!

RIJIMMY 10-22-2009 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saltheart (Post 719048)
I think these aliens would be friendly little buggers who would give us cures for all disease and also the technology to generate unlimited energy using renewable resources. They would never bomb us or try to force their beliefs on us. They would all be educated creatures and as we know educated beings never attempt to force their ideals on others by using force.

They would also be all different colors like pink and yellow and lavender and Mauve and powder blue and love each other no matter what color they were. I would imaging that when we cook them the yellow ones would taste like chicken!

ahh, but how would we feed ourselves? Cures to all diseases would mean in a few years that populations would be exploding everywhere. Famine would be ravaging the undevloped countries as wealthy countries consume all the resources. There would be massive unemployment in the medical field and most other trades as people would not be leaving jobs due to death and illness. Theres never an easy answer

The Dad Fisherman 10-22-2009 11:55 AM

Man, I'm gonna change your avatar to Bad Luck Schleprock...Wowsie Wowsie Woo Woo.

fishbones 10-22-2009 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RIJIMMY (Post 719050)
ahh, but how would we feed ourselves? Cures to all diseases would mean in a few years that populations would be exploding everywhere. Famine would be ravaging the undevloped countries as wealthy countries consume all the resources. There would be massive unemployment in the medical field and most other trades as people would not be leaving jobs due to death and illness. Theres never an easy answer


Here's your easy answer. DEATH PANELS

Just kill off old people when they reach a certain age since they won't be getting sick.

The Dad Fisherman 10-22-2009 12:36 PM

Run Logan...Run

Joe 10-22-2009 01:53 PM

It would be good new for the U.S. - other countries may have the oil - but we've got the food. We're well positioned to feed anyone who wants to buy our food.

Swimmer 10-22-2009 02:48 PM

SOYLENT GREEN for real.

Cool Beans 10-22-2009 04:49 PM

To be honest the State Dept. has a very alien friendly policy. I know Spence was given citizenship and a new car, the same as I got when I arrived. They set us up with careers and human women to make our brides. I know of 5 others aliens who frequent this board. We came to Earth, because we caught all the fish on our home planet. :rotf2::rotf2:

eastendlu 10-22-2009 06:35 PM

YouTube - What Planet Are You From? - movie - part 1 of 12

Cool Beans 10-22-2009 07:14 PM

That is funny!! So by listening to that last line, you figured out why Spence is here...lol... I'm just here for the fish and fat chicks.....:rotf2:
From space Rhode Island looked to be the capital for both, so here I am....

buckman 10-23-2009 05:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cool Beans (Post 719093)
To be honest the State Dept. has a very alien friendly policy. I know Spence was given citizenship and a new car, the same as I got when I arrived. They set us up with careers and human women to make our brides. I know of 5 others aliens who frequent this board. We came to Earth, because we caught all the fish on our home planet. :rotf2::rotf2:

You had me until the last line. I call BS:rotf2:

Cool Beans 10-23-2009 05:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buckman (Post 719164)
You had me until the last line. I call BS:rotf2:

Alright, you got me there, that's not why we left..... You see, on our world, everyone fishes and catches fish, and those few that get skunked are publicly flogged..... We left, because we got tired of the public spankings...... :morons:


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