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Back when I was a kid, Mad Magazine used to have a regular feature called "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions". My alltime favorites---guy walks in the front door soaked to the skin and his wife asks, "Is it raining?" Snappy answer--"No, I came home by sewer". Guy wrecks his car and is sitting on the ground dazed, steering wheel around his neck, bystander asks, "have an accident?" Snappy comeback--"no thanks, just had one".
"Gonna do some fishin?"--"No, I'm gonna rob a bank, I'm just setting up my alibi"
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