...I got a good laugh out of this one...
The Trial
The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with
beating your wife to death with a hammer.
"A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!
"The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law
to death with a hammer."
The voice in the back of the court room yells out, "You bastard!"
The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom,
"Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at this crime.
But no more outbursts from you, or I'll charge you with contempt. Is that
understood?"
The guy in the back of the court stands up and says,
"I'm sorry, Your Honour, but for fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard,
and every time I asked to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one."