Quote:
In November 2005, Whole Foods Market assembled an internal task force to review every step of its live lobster procurement process in an effort to improve humane conditions. A deadline of June 15, 2006 was set to determine if more humane alternatives could be implemented.
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It started with "lobster villas", you see, the trap was inhumane so they through "pots" over the side that had no sides. Of course using dead fish to catch the lobster was out so they wrapped lettuce in the bait bags inside the sideless traps. Well, that didn't work out too well. So they then upgraded the bait bags with hummus but found that it disolved far too quickly and the search was on for another bait to bag the sideless traps which by this time were being called LVCD or "Lobster Voluntary Containment Devices". The LVCDs were tried with various different baits, now referred to as "attractants", spanning the gammut from soy, to gefelte (that's the gefelte sans the fish part

) , to pita, to West Sri Lankan Prunes, to Veggie Burgers, but all for naught.
Finally they found a succesfull "attractant" when they stumbled across frozen McDonald's Kelp Patties that had been stored next to McFish Patties where over the past 15 years the fish flavor osmosed to the Kelp Patties. Thus began the successful adaptation of FMfKBS, "Frozen McFish Kelp Burger Slurry".
With millions invested to date and the tainted Kelp Burgers now in the Attractant Bags coupled to the LVCDs, they watched in awe on their CCUWTV system as the Lobsters entered the LVCDs, attracted to the attractants, and began to nibble on the FMfKBS (Frozen McFish Kelp Burger Slurry).
This was when the overlooked flaw in the desgin became most apparent as the sideless traps, nee LVCDs, were overrun by the striped gladiators of the deep and the white chinned bottom dwellers which proceeded to suck up every tasty morsel of lobster in sight! The shock and awe happened when the striped onces fenced with the lobsters until the most opportune moment to extract the claws one by one from these noble crustaceans.
Limb from Limb they shouted in horror for nights ending in cold sweat, fermenting the said reality that catching lobsters at their high standard was just not practical and just not to be...