Originally Posted by FishingWidow
Mike, here is another perspective. I am married to one of the most passionate fisherman out there today, #^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&. I also am the sister of the creator of this fine website, John. Bill and I have an 8 year old daughter and the juggling of fishing and family is a struggle. Try to NOT talk about fishing at Thanksgiving with Bill and John together or at a birthday party or First Communion with Clammer also joining us–impossible!!
When our daughter was born, Bill continued to fish hard. Sleepless nights with the baby and sleepless nights fishing really took their toll. He caught his best fish, a 50+ lb. striper when Alisson was only 2 years old. About a year later, he stopped fishing to spend more time as a father/husband. Bill is an “all or nothing” guy. If he couldn’t fish hard core, then he wouldn’t fish at all. Over the next few years I noticed he wasn’t as happy and suggested he should go fishing. I knew how much a part of him it was - but he couldn’t do it halfway. He finally wet a line again in the spring of 2004 and he’s himself again-only better. He tells me that the 2 year break made him appreciate EVEN more, not only the striped bass, but the salt air, the ringing of the bell buoys, the stars in the sky, the quiet stillness out on the rocks when you are the only one out there. He’s truly happy out there and I’d be trying to “cage an animal” if I stopped him.
Have we had our fights over his fishing??? YOU BET!!! Fishing has managed to become part of our family and home. The phone rings off the hook so much with fishing reports, etc. that I don’t answer the phone anymore. I’ve stepped on dead eels when I’m doing laundry (eel tank next to washer/dryer) and pulled fish hooks out of the carpet. The driveway is covered with fish scales and our front porch has Grundens laying across the benches. There are fishing magazines in every room. His truck stinks of fish, his boots stink of fish, heck HE stinks of fish. But I could never take it away from him. He wouldn’t be the same guy without it.
We discuss quite often how much of a strain fishing puts on our marriage. Many marriages have broken up over it and we’ve vowed to be committed to make it work. Sorry for the long post but I promise I’m eventually getting to the point-So, how do you get to fish lots and keep your gf happy? My advice, be open and honest with her and INVITE her. Tell her how important it is to you, how great it makes you feel, how it is so much a part of who you are. Take her with you and get her some gear. Bill fishes conventional so he got me spinning gear. Show her how to cast and watch her fish. It’s no fun just watching someone catch fish. I bet when she lands a fish, she’ll want to go more often and have a greater appreciation of what this is all about. If she has no desire to fish after you've taken her, then hopefully you can devote enough time to her off-season so that she knows fishing is secondary to her.
I fished with Bill before our daughter was born. I fished with him until I was 6 months pregnant and the fear of falling on the rocks kept me home. I’ve fished Chatham with him, fished the rotation at Quonnie, slung eels in Narragansett, and watched pogies get chased by stripers this past June. Now that Alisson is getting older, we’re getting into it more as a family. She said that one of her best days ever was when she went schoolie fishing on Daddy’s boat this past spring. When she grows up and is on her own, I will be hopefully fishing by Bill’s side as much as possible. What’s that expression….If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!!
Leslie
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