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After dying a grisly death in an Afghan cave, Osama made his way to the
pearly gates. There, he was greeted by George Washington. "How dare you
attack the nation I helped conceive!" yelled Washington, slapping Osama
in the face.
Patrick Henry came up from behind. "You wanted to end America's
liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punched Osama in the nose.
James Madison came next, and said, "This is why I allowed the
government to provide for the common defense!" He took a sledgehammer
and whacked Osama's knees.
Osama was subjected to similar beatings from John Randolph, James
Monroe, and 65 other people who had the same love for liberty and
America.
As he writhed on the ground, Thomas Jefferson hurled him back toward the
gate where he was to be judged.
As Osama awaited his journey to his final very hot destination, he
screamed, "This is not what I was promised!"
An angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for
you. What did you think I said?"
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