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Old 12-30-2022, 01:13 PM   #163
wdmso
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Somerset MA
Posts: 9,111
Quote:
Originally Posted by detbuch View Post
The black nurse didn't have to tear your wife a new one unless she was consumed by a racial grievance that could only be relieved by striking out at someone she considered to be the cause, or part of the cause, of that grievance. The "lesson" I would have learned from such abusive behavior is that the black nurse had unresolved issues and that I would be better off not having many personal conversations with her for fear of inadvertently saying something "wrong." She could have politely told your wife that saying "colored" is offensive to her and please say black, if you don't mind. What any Blacks, Negros, Coloreds, Afro-Americans, personally wish to be called, is not that definitive or constant from time to time. To say that only they can decide what is derogatory is denying anyone else a use of language they don't personally consider derogatory. This is especially true if there is no standardized usage that for everyone is purely descriptive. When people take umbrage at words like "homosexual" or heterosexual or bisexual or asexual which have no inherent derogatory connotations and then decide to replace them with their own words, like "gay," they are insulting not only a language, but all of those who have used, and wish to use, that word to describe their own experiences--language is seized by a select few at the discouragement of anyone else from its appropriate use. That's a form of insult that is probably intended.

I still don't know what is the preferred or "correct" diction, Black or Afro-American. Black seems to be the choice of the day. But "people of color" in certain instances is quite OK--and very "inclusive" and a sort of self-satisfying jab/insult to "whites" who are excluded from the implicitly better group.

BTW, I've noticed that your writing has improved a lot, maybe from your daily back and forth on the forum. Still a ways to go. But keep it up, you'll eventually show your kids that you can do better than "fortune cookie" talk.
unless she was consumed by a racial grievance

You act as if they got in a fight, and she wrote my wife up to HR

It’s not my or my wife’s place to criticize her response we’re not Black and no nothing of her past

If she called my wife a cracker and my wife tore her a new one I don’t think it would be because she was consumed by a racial grievance

But their are many who are absolutely driven by and consumed by a racial grievance. Just not this story
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