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AS I AGE
AS I AGE, I REALISE THAT:
1. I talk to myself,------ because sometimes I need expert advice.
2. Sometimes I roll my eyes ---- out loud.
3. I don't need anger management. --------I need people to stop pissing me off.
4. My people skills are just fine.------- It's my tolerance of idiots that needs work.
5. The biggest lie I tell myself is --------"I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
6. When I was a child I thought naptime was punishment.-------- Now it's like a mini vacation..
7. The day the world runs out of whisky --------is just too terrible to think about.
8. Even duct tape can't fix stupid,-------- but it can muffle the sound.
9. Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes;------- come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller.
10. At my age "Getting Lucky" means walking into a room ---------and remembering what I came in there for.
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