Grumpage like its going outta style!

[ThrowingTimber]

My first grumpage post.

Car needs to be inspected. Fine car goes in, pases all, fails emissions . O2 sensor is dead. Got 30 days to replace it no problem. Go t car parts store, swap it out right in the lot. Good to go. Muffler is looking ratty, get it replaced, no problem done. Get oil change while at it. Bring car for emissions test, pass.

Next day get to work I park car buckles. Wtf? Did they do to my car while emissions testing it. Ok, I really gotta get in to work I’ll check it out after my shift. Works done, get to car. Its dead odd. Battery cable is loose? Odd? Connect cable, reset clock, screw the presets at this point. Start driving car. Its b#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&g, rpms going from 1000 to 2000 jumpy? Odd my car doesn’t do this? Timing belt changed in spring? Odd. Ahh maybe I need dry gas. Get to gas station add dry gas, that’ll fix it. Nope. Odd.

Week later, Thursday (dad and I were going to do a full tune up etc on that sat morn), on way home from work driving semi normal, still yup u guessed it odd. Take exit 5b off of route 1 heading for home, get to bottom of exit ramp and car stops. WTf? 4 yrs this car never did this? Fire it back up I know this is bad, shouldda missed work(hate missing work) driving past gas station, voice in head check oil(cant stop, left wallet at home this morning left in a hurry hate being late for work), drive past gas station. I’m doing 15mph down route 2 pulled over, a-hole in suv wont go around prefers to sit on my ass high beaming me(thanks pal, way to be human) trun left onto my road, driving sputter sputter, sputter SPAT, ok I know that smell, oil burning wtf? Car passed inspection and emissions yesterday? Coast down it to drive, (car dies on coast man this car is f’d voice in head says) crank it up one more time to pull in drive. Aha I’m home! Run inside, grab wallet, sweatshirt(it was that week where it was really blowing hard!) I’m out in my work clothes in drive leaning into engine taking a look at everything. Ah, oil check the oil , oil what oil? I just got an oil change wheres the oil, check plug, don’t tell me they forgot the oil plug!! (nope its there) F’it, jog to the gas station bout 1 mile or 2 not too good at that stuff. Halfway there its hunny on phone, how was work, I gotta go! U ok yea I gotta go before my engine seizes. Need help? No I’m cool(they’re always short handed, idiots work for her and she cant leave them alone) continue my jog, (crap I’m outta shape, should stop smoking, mebbe shes right) Wonder what time it is?(station closes at 730) Wow its cold out! AHA! I know what to do, call buddy! (I owe him beer) Need favor meet me at gas station need to get home real quick to dump this oil in engine etc etc, continue my walk. Get to station, he’s parked out front, get oil. Go home dump in oil engine is saved (for now). Let oil soak in overnight.

Hunny, drops me @ work next day(I don’t like to miss work). Hunny picks me up, 45mins –1 hour each way. Dad calls, wtf happened to your car? Explain, Be there in the AM. Cool, I’m ready to dismantle this fuggin thing, Dad shows up, we change: oil, oil filter, air filter, gas filter, cap, rotor, plugs wires, check bat(good to go) Reset the ecu in car after all changes, fire it up, It LIVES!!! Still runs like Mr. Hanky the Christmas poo. Managed to get it to Honda, If you saw a car shooting flaming chunks of ceramic on 95 it was me, yea hi! Thanks, I know my exhaust is on fire! (melting my bumper) get car back from Honda(they rock, even though they wouldn’t give me a loaner) You changed your muffler recently, yup I did it was starting to go and I don’t let stuff get out of control, you know preventative stuff. Honda guy- Umm ahh yea they f’d up your car , me-huh? Honda guy- your cat, is collapsed and the ceramic was blocking the exhaust shut. Me- mental pictures of air going into air filter and making its way through system- exit headers then through cat then ahh crap man . Ok so its fixed, now and I’m done my grump.