THIS just LIT MY FUSE

[Raven]

i'm sitting here workin in the back office for a few
waiting to hear the fed ex guy pull up my long driveway
and deliver our NEW cell phones that we've been anxiously waiting for...

their pretty cool with minny querty key pads for texting
and all the bells and whistles, blah blah.... right?

weeLL these fed ex driver's knock like friggan tinkerbell
and the next thing i know i hear him.........
leaving instead of arriving

theres a : sorry we missed you sticker
on the front storm door and hes freakin GONE->>>>>>

da data dat dat da dah....out comes my CAN of SPINACH

munch, munch, munch, and off i go
like a bat out of HELL

i could tell by what i heard that he went down the hill
instead of up the Hill

i proceeded to Break all the town speeding restrictions
going 75 to 80 mph -> just to find his sneaky ass

and there he is about to cross the main road
this guy in a big pickup see's me trying to catch him
and like the JACKass that he is starts swerving too
to block my damn view

he has no idea who he's messing with - i can assure you
as i was quite LIVID at that POINT and out for BLOOD


finally 3 miles later fed ex guy makes his next delivery stop
and i go have a little chat with this driver.........

he says:
well , i heard your DOG barkin but nobody seemed home....
are you kidden me? my dog is at my feet and definitely NOT barkin
because she didn't hear him arrive either.....

so NOW, i am going to mount a huge bell i have that can be heard
in the next town it's so loud .....right next to the darn door
with a permanent sign that says
-> " all deliveries " ring BELL or die!

reading my manual now ...razzin fraggin sob dumb xyzfuk

[spence]

I'm surprised you were so reserved.

-spence

[Backbeach Jake]

Geezuz Raven, over a cell phone?

[Nebe]

RAVEN.. there are herbal remedies to relieve stress.

[spence]

Originally Posted by Nebe

RAVEN.. there are herbal remedies to relieve stress.

Talk to Willie Nelson.

-spence

[Swimmer]

Hey you know Willie got a regular haircut. Cut of that pigtail a few weeks ago.

[Nebe]

Originally Posted by Swimmer

Hey you know Willie got a regular haircut. Cut of that pigtail a few weeks ago.

yeah. dont blame him.. people thought he was a hippie.

[Raven]

Originally Posted by Backbeach Jake

Geezuz Raven, over a cell phone?

no more like a senoir moment where he snuck one past me...
and i was supposed to be workin in the driveway see...
i go into to play hooky at S-B got to watch this ted conference thing on ocean recovery that was cool and just,,, z;point; lost it...

where were my keener senses then????
my esp.... on a freakin break havin a dunkin doughnut or sumthin
i got sucked into the computer Black hole of the wonderful internet stuff....
dropped my guard Jake ...i'm slippin ...gettin OLD

but see there we all these kids texting us at all hours of the night
saying junk like.......

if you woke up lying nakid on my bed
what would be the first 3 words you'd say.....
and all this junk like that...

and obiviously thought we were someone else
named Becca ...they were obsessed to find her
making me crazy like a caged LION GRRRRRRR

couldnt wait to AcTIVATE and DISA\aBLE ALL TEXTING

[Raven]

Originally Posted by Backbeach Jake

Geezuz Raven, over a cell phone?

no more like a senoir moment where he snuck one past me...
and i was supposed to be workin in the driveway see...
i go into to play hooky at S-B got to watch this ted conference thing on
ocean recovery that was cool and just,,, z;point; lost it...

where were my keener senses then????
my esp.... on a freakin break havin a dunkin doughnut or sumthin
i got sucked into the computer Black hole of the wonderful internet stuff....
dropped my guard Jake ...i'm slippin ...gettin OLD

but see there we all these kids texting us at all hours of the night
saying junk like.......

if you woke up lying nakid on my bed
what would be the first 3 words you'd say.....
and all this junk like that...

and obiviously thought we were someone else
named Becca ...they were obsessed to find her
night and day
making me crazy like a caged LION GRRRRRRR Roar

couldnt wait to AcTIVATE and DISA\aBLE ALL TEXTING

[Raven]

i can't stand no more......

[PRBuzz]

Now there was a senior moment, Raven posted same thing 2X...guess he forgot he hit the send button 5 min previous.

[justplugit]

Should have had UPS send them, their trucks are way more noisey
than FED EX.

With that noise they never have to ring the door bell.

It's like they're in creeper gear at full acceleration all the time.

[Raven]

Originally Posted by PRBuzz

Now there was a senior moment, Raven posted same thing 2X...guess he forgot he hit the send button 5 min previous.

i'm pushin real hard cuz of lost time due to being sick of poison ivy venom,,,
and havin zero energy for two weeks almost

now i'm hauling stuff by the trailer load as production
has sky rocketed again

[Raven]

Originally Posted by justplugit

Should have had UPS send them, their trucks are way more noisey
than FED EX.

With that noise they never have to ring the door bell.

It's like they're in creeper gear at full acceleration all the time.

left a huge oil leak stain on the driveway basterds !!!

[Nebe]

[Raven]

putting homer simpsons brain scan on a public website