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Old 12-22-2000, 02:16 PM   #1
Got Stripers
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I'm bored, here's some holiday cheer I wrote just for yuks.

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
not a damn thing was working, not even my mouse.
My isp was down, I couldn’t connect;
my holiday posts, I’d have to forget.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of computer games, danced in their heads.
And mamma was drinking to calm her nerves down;
this holiday just about makes her melt down.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the monitor to see what was the matter.
I tripped over dozens of batteries spread out on the floor;
the language would be censored as my face met the door.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
made me sad with three months of this crap;
before I could pull the boat from under it’s wrap.

But a UPS van, making a last minute stop,
I knew in a moment it would be payday.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
and he whistled, and shouted, and said not today.

"Now, Saltheart! And, Slipnot! And, Fisherwomen and JOHN!
All received their shipping rod tubes this morning at dawn.
To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall!
I yelled as he left, come on that can’t be them all.

So back in the house, with a frown on my face;
with an arm full of boxes, from each mail order place.
All for the kids, but nothing for Dad,
I’d fished far too much, and so I must have been bad.

And then, in a twinkling, as I sat on the floor,
The steady knocking of someone at the front door.
As I drew the door open, whom do I meet,
but John from RI, with his tackle box at his feet?

He was dressed all in Beans, from his head to his foot,
and his clothes made a statement, or was it that look?
A bundle of jigs he had flung on his back,
and eelskins galore were spilling out from his pack.


His eyes -- how they twinkled! His dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses; had he been drinking some sherry?
As he entered the house, my dogs went berserk,
and my wife gave us both a very stern look.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
and rigged a 10 footer from reel to the tip,
complete with a swivel, fluoro leader and jig.
Then looked at me smirking as he studied the rig.

And laying his finger aside of his nose,
he smiled as he said you know why I’m here,
I’ve come for the Large it’s that time of year.
I said your mistaken, the Bass are all gone
and won’t be back until spring comes around.

He sprang out the door and jumped in his truck
and said I’m disappointed Got Stripers, this is truly bad luck.
You said come catch Large and I come all this way,
To find out you haven’t a clue, how to catch them today.

As he drove away, he yelled out the door,
I might come back if you learn how to fish,
but you better not waste my time on a wish.
I don’t mind travelling I haven’t a care,
but bait me with Large and you better beware
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Old 12-22-2000, 05:07 PM   #2
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Chuckle chuckle. Pretty good, Didn't know you were a poet.
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Old 12-22-2000, 06:25 PM   #3
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Got Stripers that was pretty dam good, you sure your in the right business, LMAO. I love it!!!!!!

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Old 12-22-2000, 07:40 PM   #4
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the talent The talent on this board is unbelievable . Fisher poets 1 and all,
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Old 12-22-2000, 11:22 PM   #5
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I know you were bored,
so I won't waste a line,
I think "oh my Lord",
Have they nothing better,
to do with their time?????

OK<OK I know I'm not a poet....I tried..... :P
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Old 12-23-2000, 09:38 AM   #6
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I don't know Jenn that was a pretty good start!!!!

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Old 12-23-2000, 11:12 AM   #7
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As he drove away, he yelled out the door,
I might come back if you learn how to fish,
but you better not waste my time on a wish.
I don’t mind travelling I haven’t a care,
but bait me with Large and you better beware

... With a bewildered look, upon his face,
Faded visions of Cohassett, Watch Hill and the Race.
Who does he think he is to look down on me so,
I will get a big fish, I know, I know.

'I will show him, I will show them all.
I can get the big one, spring, summer and fall.'
He cast lines for and aft away from the dock,
Headed t'wards Minot, like a member of the flock.

G'Stripers right arm made an long, smooth cast,
A tug and a pull, the water errupted in blast.
The hand-poured plastic jerkbait sped under his skiff,
Reel protesting to strains of a massive fish.

Lo' and behold, I have a monster fish on.
'Here we go, now I'll show John'!
A she danced and darted sped t'wards the shore,
finding every cut, boulder, ledge and more.

As time swept by, she halted her charge,
And reeled along side, she looked quite large.
G'Stripers gave a mighty grunt,
As he heaved aboard the bounty of a successfull hunt.

Cast from the beach, a laser light shone,
a shadowy figure marched forward alone.
With heavy waders all torn a tatter,
5mm of neoprene making him look fatter :P ,

A whispered voice toned 'Now you'll feel better'
'You've proven yet again, you can still go and get her'
And as the Ghost of Striper's Future softly spoke,
GS released his catch into a fog thick like smoke.

'Swim forward, swim on' GS coached his striped girl.
With a shake of her tail, now gone in a whirl.
The upturns of a smile spead across his face,
The high still strong from the thrill of the chase.

... And G'Stripers woke up, beads of Salt on his Head,
With a scream so loud, he could wake up the Dead,
The misses wakes up and asks 'Whatsa matter',
The dances of Linesiders all had to scatter.

Nothing wrong honey, All is right now dear,
A dream where John said I had nothing to fear.
As G'stripers head went to rest,
All he was sorry for was missing October(FISH!)fest!!!


***************************

BTW, I don't wear LL Beans :-D

Merry Christmas GS, may your stocking be stuffed with many a hand-poured, soft-plastic, jerk bait :P

~Fix the Bait~ ~Pogies Forever~

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Old 12-23-2000, 11:55 AM   #8
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Excellant John, man spring can't come soon enough, now that youv'e got me all worked up into a froth. I know what I want for Xmas a warm winter and speedy return to spring.

Happy holiday and I look forward to seeing you at the show, tight lines.
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Old 12-23-2000, 12:24 PM   #9
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You guys are killin me!!!!!!!!!!! I want to go NOW.

fisherwomen & baitcaster
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Old 12-23-2000, 10:45 PM   #10
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That's too much! keep up the creativity people.
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Old 12-24-2000, 01:45 PM   #11
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And as he drifted off
into fish dream land
He dreamt of the Ditch
with its rocks , weeds and sand

Just A cast up current
a short drift and the bounce
a 50 was his intent
he would weigh it to the ounce

For in the fast waters of the canal
a small fish gives a might charge
Would he be helpless in his flannels
If he hooked a truly large?

Confidently he stalked his prey
I can land a great fish
despite what JPowers has to say!

Then finally it happened
was it a pull on his line
No sadly what harkened
was his alarm at wake up time!

So Got Stripers still seeks
day and night and in sleep
a great fish at its peek
The one fish he will Keep

Saltheart
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Old 12-24-2000, 04:27 PM   #12
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That's great Saltheart, and happy Holidays to you. Is this the neverending poem of striper dreamers?
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Old 12-25-2000, 12:49 PM   #13
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I hope the upcoming year turns out as good as you guys have me dreaming about, lol. I haven't battled a 50 since the late 80's so I'm hoping these dreams turn into reality.

I've got spring fever bad and these dreams aren't helping me, thanks anyway, tight lines.
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Old 12-25-2000, 01:15 PM   #14
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Good one, Salty!!! Merry Christmas!!!

G'Stripers, you have a long hard road ahead if you are already displaying the dep dark signs of major withdrawl...

But I know, as I also get that tug in my dreams, that we'll make it as we do every year...

~Fix the Bait~ ~Pogies Forever~

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Old 12-21-2009, 07:58 AM   #15
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Bumping some Christmas poems from NINE years ago

~Fix the Bait~ ~Pogies Forever~

Striped Bass Fishing - All Stripers


Kobayashi Maru Election - there is no way to win.


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Old 12-21-2009, 09:06 AM   #16
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Twas half past four
when he awoke from his sleep
Still drenched in sweat
from dreams of the deep

His bladder too full,
pisser stiff as a post
To the bathroom he stumbled
his knees hurting the most

Trying to pee
he just had no luck
This getting old thing
is starting to suck

So forcing it down
he started to strain
Desperate now
to relieve the pain

Relief at last
soon came his way
But his aim was bad
and he started to sway

No noise did he hear
Just spray on his feet
And he knew he was screwed
he had just drenched the seat

He heard his wife stir
and it filled him with fear
His heart skipped a beat
as her footsteps drew near

Goddamn it he thought
can nothing go right?
What fisherman can't piss
in the dark with no light?

But fast it got worse
so bad he could shout
Just his dumb luck
the toilet paper was out.

So what else could he do
in a situation so foul?
He did what he could
and cleaned it up with her towel.

Not a class move
he had to admit
But a wife with a wet butt
will cause some bad sh!t

So feeling secure
he soon was asleep
And his wife too was content,
she'd switched towels with the creep.
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Old 12-21-2009, 07:06 PM   #17
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Those were great. You guys made the night for me
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Old 12-22-2009, 12:04 PM   #18
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Where the H*LL did all that time go.
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Old 12-22-2009, 07:58 PM   #19
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way to much talent on this board
me thinks John should be saving these stories, because they're classic
happy holidays
paul
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Old 12-22-2009, 10:38 PM   #20
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o thats some good sheet

thats why they call it fishing not catching
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Old 12-24-2009, 12:06 AM   #21
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Great thread this one is !! Numby you must be peekin at me !! 75 is a bad year.

low & slow 37
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