Why are you grumpy??

[bloocrab]

I'll tell ya why I'm so EFFIN grumpy!!!

I built a new home in a country-like, VERY nice area....you know, grass, trees, yards that aren't tarred or cemented...I can no longer lay a folding chair across my bedroom window and crawl into the next house over, kinda deal...Those who've lived in the inner cities know what I mean. I could have made pornos of my neighbors and they'd never had know it..... , pray that you weren't my neighbor
Anyway...ever since moving out here I've noticed a very strange phenomenon. It didn't happen during the winter time...but when Spring broke through...(or at least tried to break through)...it started.
This very LOUD and ANNOYING noise that I never had to deal with before. Sometimes I lay there for over an hour with my blood boiling because I can't sleep. Back in the city, I could sleep through police sirens, car alarms, fire engines, junkies in the alley below...but this.... noise around my house just kills me. They must be on steroids out here...It sounds like a damn orchestra!!! My wife says I'm nutz....but I can't help it. It comes through the windows, the walls...I feel like they're in the same room with me. As soon as I start hearing it, I feel like I focus in on it which makes it even worse. I try to find them but I can't...I think I'm closing in on the sound, but they're not there....
AM I REALLY GO NUTZO???

Mikey, how can I make it STOP??
How can I stop the DAMN NOISE that won't let me sleep???


...oh, did I mention....I'm also a balding man....but still struggling with Elmer's glue to hold the last few strands that I have. I refuse to look beautiful...I enjoy the breeze that lifts those few folicles on my head. I don't comb it anymore...too afraid of derooting them...but I'm proud, they're still there!!

OK...enuff grumpage from me.............for now.

BTW.....I think these are the culprits of ......."THE NOISE"
Is it only when they rub their legs....or when they rub their fannies like in the picture???