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Grumpy Old Pharts Board Gerritol, Ex-Lax, Immodium, Bad Breath - all requirements for the Grumpy Board

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Old 08-11-2006, 11:59 AM   #61
cheferson
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slicker then sheet on a door knob,: colder then a witches tit,:

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Old 08-12-2006, 03:47 PM   #62
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"If you don't like what's for supper, there's a diner up the road"
"Get me a switch!"
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Old 08-12-2006, 05:44 PM   #63
justplugit
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Is there any dessert? " yup, windpudding"

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-13-2006, 09:49 AM   #64
Van
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Whadyda think money grows on trees?
and my favorite was...."You'll get nothing and you'll like it"

~..~..~.. ><((((º>
Things done at the last possible minute are done with the greatest possible information. Procrastination is, therefore, the most efficient means of doing things.
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Old 08-14-2006, 11:45 AM   #65
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I have a very old school grandmother in West Dennis that's 102 and lives next door to our summer house. To this day if I dress up even a little to go out somewhere, she says, "Oh Jimmy, don't you look gay." This sends my wife and kids into hysterics.
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Old 08-16-2006, 01:28 PM   #66
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When we were trying to pull a fast one on mom for staying out late, etc: "I was born at night, but not last night"


Dad, to the daughters: The difference between a bad haircut and a good haircut is 2 weeks.

"Many go fishing all their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after." - Henry David Thoreau
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Old 08-16-2006, 07:26 PM   #67
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Its Hard Telling Not Knowing
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Old 08-17-2006, 03:32 PM   #68
justplugit
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"He's as busy as a one armed paper hanger with the itch".

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-17-2006, 04:35 PM   #69
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Arrow

a stich in time will save nine.....
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Old 08-18-2006, 05:49 PM   #70
justplugit
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"Who's bright idea was this".

"He's flyin by the seat of his pants".

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-18-2006, 07:09 PM   #71
CANAL RAT
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heres a good one from my grandpa "everythings closed up tighter than a bulls ass at fly time".

todays schoolie is tomorrows keeper,todays keeper is tomorrows cow,practice catch and release!!!.

GOD BLESS THE NRA!!!!

ROCK AND ROLL WILL NEVER DIE!!!!!
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Old 08-19-2006, 12:10 AM   #72
The Dad Fisherman
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Another of my Dad's Classics. "Sit Down before I Knock you Down"

"If you're arguing with an idiot, make sure he isn't doing the same thing."
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Old 08-19-2006, 05:43 AM   #73
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well....i remember this

having to grow up with 5 other mischievious brothers...

i got blamed for many things as the scape goat....

even if i was off on a walk about.... i knew ever inch of the woods and the charles river...

my dad would say... i only trust you as far as i can throw you.
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Old 08-19-2006, 11:07 AM   #74
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"What he needs is a good swift kick in the rear end"


"Keep it up and you'll feel the tip of my shoe"

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-20-2006, 12:35 PM   #75
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Thought of a few more :

"he's a goner"

"look what the cat dragged in"

"it's seen better days"

"ignorance is bliss"

"your guess is as good as mine"

"procrastination is the thief of time"

"as useless as teats on a bull"

and my very favorite of all time--"if BS was $$ we'd all be millionaires"

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-20-2006, 01:58 PM   #76
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How about

when you can't make up your mind quick enough and you hear, "fish or cut bait."

Swimmer a.k.a. YO YO MA
Serial Mailbox Killer/Seal Fisherman
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Old 08-20-2006, 07:21 PM   #77
gone fishin
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Another %$%$%$%$%$%$%$ - worlds full of them - no demand!

low & slow 37
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Old 08-21-2006, 08:49 PM   #78
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"why should the devil have all the fun?"

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-21-2006, 09:31 PM   #79
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Smile

my uncle gordon would always say...

ya better be careful or you'll kick the bucket.
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Old 08-22-2006, 07:37 AM   #80
Roger
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We're French, so there were always phrases like:
"Pickup your room" translation - clean your room
"next time you run through my garden, go around"
"there it was - gone"

Best regards,
Roger
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Old 08-22-2006, 10:01 AM   #81
Mike P
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Roger
We're French, so there were always phrases like:
"Pickup your room" translation - clean your room
"next time you run through my garden, go around"
"there it was - gone"
And I'll bet you parked the cars in the driveway side by each

Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools, because they have to say something.
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Old 08-22-2006, 10:54 AM   #82
Roger
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike P
And I'll bet you parked the cars in the driveway side by each
I still do

On Tursdee my pepere might yell to my memere, "Gertrude, trow me out the window my keys. I'll bring da machine around front so I can bring you ta go make your stores down Social cwen. When you go ta Halmacs buy a coupla two tree steaks, dare on sale for a buck tree eighty. While you make your stores I’ll pickup the machine and make gas."

Translation for the non-RI French:
On Thursday my grandfather might yell to my grandmother, “Gertrude, throw my keys to me from the window. I’ll bring the car around front and take you to Social Corner to do your grocery shopping. When you go to Almacs, buy a few steaks, they’re on sale for three dollars and eighty cents. While you’re shopping I’ll clean the car and get it filled with gasoline.

Of course, I can’t speak French nearly as well as they could speak English.

Best regards,
Roger
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Old 08-22-2006, 11:26 AM   #83
Mike P
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Those two years I worked at the Stop & Shop on Diamond Hill Rd were a blast. You had to know the difference between "hair spray"--Glade or Renuzit--and "air spray"---Clarol.

Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools, because they have to say something.
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Old 08-28-2006, 05:26 PM   #84
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Mrs Link grew up,in the projects 5 sisters totally on there own, would ask? where's the hair brush? " If it was up your arse you'd know",then they would be called "ungratefull little Chits" if they asked for anything, it was all about their FATHER. but there 5 brothers that lived next door that he wish he had, oh yes the mom was divorced RED HEAD, He bought the boys everything even drove them to school, I never saw the EVIL Farther in action " good thing" & my wife now ,thought back then Ketchup hot water and stale bread was an awesome meal, condiments kept the girls going.
I hope he is rolling over in his hole over and over
ML SR

" Happy as a clam at high tide "
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Old 08-28-2006, 05:53 PM   #85
striprman
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Ya think our last name is Rockefeller ?
Go get the strap
Just who the f do you think you are ?
Where were you when god passed out brains ?
Looks like the floor needs a good scrubbin' (after I had already scrubbed it 4 times)
Your brother wouldn't do that (ya right)
Your going to bed right after supper
No supper, go straight to bed.
For the 96th millionth time
How many times do I have to tell you ?

Last edited by striprman; 02-03-2007 at 10:19 PM..

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Old 08-30-2006, 08:23 AM   #86
justplugit
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Whata ya think i'm made of money?

" Choose Life "
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Old 08-30-2006, 09:28 AM   #87
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I hate to say these but :::

shut the f-in nigger music off.... beatles or monkeys playing ..lol
your as useless as tits on a bull
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Old 08-31-2006, 06:35 AM   #88
PoPin Plug
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dont make me backhand you painfull

i need fish!
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Old 08-31-2006, 07:56 PM   #89
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-Cool your jets.
-The, "You don't know sh@@ from Shinola."
-Hey Capt. A-hole try and get home earlier next time.
-Or if I was late getting up,"It lives, it breathes, it crawls on it's belly like a reptile."
-When bringing girls home for dinner and then going to my room I had to leave a boot in the door so it wasn't shut, one time with a particular hussy I got the, "Hey Capt. Sperm nevermind the boot, just take the doot off it's hinges jack."

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Old 09-03-2006, 08:03 AM   #90
justplugit
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when it came to studs all full of themselves--"now they're runnin, soon they'll be walkin"

" Choose Life "
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