Striper Talk Striped Bass Fishing, Surfcasting, Boating

     

Left Nav S-B Home Register FAQ Members List S-B on Facebook Arcade WEAX Tides Buoys Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Right Nav

Left Container Right Container
 

Go Back   Striper Talk Striped Bass Fishing, Surfcasting, Boating » Striper Chat - Discuss stuff other than fishing ~ The Scuppers and Political talk » Grumpy Old Pharts Board

Grumpy Old Pharts Board Gerritol, Ex-Lax, Immodium, Bad Breath - all requirements for the Grumpy Board

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 01-20-2013, 09:44 AM   #1
PRBuzz
BuzzLuck
iTrader: (0)
 
PRBuzz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Brockton
Posts: 6,414
Send a message via Skype™ to PRBuzz
Damn women drivers!

This morning on the interstate,
I looked over to my left and there was a woman

In a brand new Cadillac
Doing 65 mph


With her face up next to her


Rear view mirror

Putting on her eyeliner.

I looked away
For a couple seconds...


to continue shaving

And when I looked back she was

Halfway over in my lane,


Still working on that makeup.

As a man,

I don't scare easily.
But she scared me so much;

I had to put on my seat belt

and I dropped


My electric shaver


Which knocked

The donut
Out of my other hand.

In all The confusion of trying
To straighten out the car


Using my knees against
The steering wheel,


It knocked

My Cell Phone


Away from my ear


Which fell


Into the coffee

Between my legs!


Splashed,


And burned


Big Jim and the Twins,


Ruined the damn phone,

Soaked my trousers,


And disconnected an
Important call.

Damn women drivers!

Given the diversity of the human species, there is no “normal” human genome sequence. We are all mutants.
PRBuzz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2013, 09:50 AM   #2
Nebe
Registered User
iTrader: (0)
 
Nebe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Libtardia
Posts: 21,554
LOLOLOL
Posted from my iPhone/Mobile device
Nebe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2013, 02:26 PM   #3
Hookedagain
Registered User
iTrader: (0)
 
Hookedagain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Somerset Ma
Posts: 1,703
Hey! Leave my wife alone...
Hookedagain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-20-2013, 10:21 PM   #4
Slipknot
Super Moderator
iTrader: (0)
 
Slipknot's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Middleboro MA
Posts: 17,119
Thanks buzz I needed that laugh after what I just came from
Posted from my iPhone/Mobile device
Slipknot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2013, 12:30 PM   #5
Saltheart
Registered User
iTrader: (1)
 
Saltheart's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Cumberland,RI
Posts: 8,555
When I was working at TI I would come off 295 onto 95 north and have to get off right away again at 152. In that short distance , there is a lot of traffic , on top of that people coming onto 95 and leaving 95. Its very hectic and your survival instincts say you should be paying attention.

I regularly saw woman with a cell phone in one hand , doing their makeup in the rear view mirror with the other and by default , since I could see both hands , they were steering with their knees.

Anyway , funny story Buzz!

Saltheart
Custom Crafted Rods by Saltheart
Saltheart is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2013, 04:01 PM   #6
Pete_G
Registered User
iTrader: (0)
 
Pete_G's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Newport, RI
Posts: 2,316
Spotted an elderly male with a cigarette, yapping on a cell phone, and a patch over one eye in my rear view mirror at a light a month or so ago.

I moved over into another lane asap...
Pete_G is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2013, 07:14 PM   #7
Jenn
Moderator
iTrader: (0)
 
Jenn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: 4 hours from my favorite place
Posts: 5,366
HAHA! Love it

Bad drivers come in all shapes, sizes & genders thats for sure! I've seen a woman reading the paper, a man using his laptop, etc. but one thing I will never forget is a night about 15 years ago when we were Cape bound camper in tow, after work (late, about midnight) hubby couldnt drive anymore and was exhausted. I took the wheel while he slept and had 495 S to myself, easy cruisin right? 20 minutes later flying out of the darkeness a convertible (yes with top down) SCREAMING by me (well barely, missing the trailer is more like it) I was doing 75 watched the car swerve from grass to grass, they had to be doing over 100 MPH and thought there was no way in hell I wasnt going to pass this car and dead body in another minute or two. Never did, but I to this day will never forget that and have no idea how people can drive that way (had to be 5 sheets to the wind) . People do so scary azz stuff......

Simplify.......
Jenn is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:52 PM.


Powered by vBulletin. Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Please use all necessary and proper safety precautions. STAY SAFE Striper Talk Forums
Copyright 1998-20012 Striped-Bass.com