So I get pulled over today...

[Raven]

i am a crazy MOFO sometimes i'll have to admit...
especially when i have a burr under my saddle...
well, one day i was changing out my clutch & tranny in a
chevy truck...and had it balanced precariously
on top of the cross beam underneath while i got in position
as i was lying on my back about to lift off and into place.
well that SON of a beotch fell on my neck and although
i went into self defense mode my kung fu didn't keep it
from putting a gash in my neck on the left side even though
i caught the weight of it and wasnt killed in the process....

so then being thoroughly pissed off ...i slammed that sucker
in double time having had enough auto mechanics for one day,
and went to have myself a couple of real cold beers to calm down.

on my way home i was still in a fit to be tied kind of MOOD and was
dodging all the POT holes in the old country ROAD...and i get pulled
over...so before the kind officer even approached my truck i yelled:
"YOU BETTER NOT BE PULLING ME OVER FOR SPEEDING" knowing
exactly how fast i was traveling....and he walks up....and says
to me: " Have you been drinking?" and i replied loudly and HONESTLY ...
YES i sure have....i had a couple of cold beers after my damn transmission fell on my neck.... and i pointed to the GASH and bruise....
he takes one look and says: " jesus CHRIST almighty" shaking his head
as he clearly saw the FIRE in my eyes.... and then asked why i was swerving from side to side....so i pointed backwards and again told the truth..." i was just avoiding all those POT HOLES.... " he looks back
and says... ok ? YOU can go.