Cancer sucks - Striper Talk Striped Bass Fishing, Surfcasting, Boating

RIJIMMY · 05-19-2005, 08:16 AM

So we find out last October my Dad has bladder cancer, stage 4, already in the lymph nodes. My Dad has always been active, runs, swims, watches what he eats, he is 63. This hit my family very hard.
Things did not look good, he couldnt eat, lost weight, pain, weakness, the whole range. Since the cancer is already outside of the bladder, the docs say it should not be removed but they need to proceed with chemo. After 6 months of hard core chemo, the test results came back extremely positive, lymph nodes looked good and miracuously, the bladder was clean too.
My Dad's health started to improve, he gained weight, exercised and things looked good.
Then a few weeks ago he started going downhill quickly, couldnt eat, began feeling weak. In three weeks, he became worse than he was before. We get the test results yesterday that the cancer is in the liver, and possibly the lungs. He is in bad shape. They are resuming chemo but cannot hit him with full doses becasue of the toxcicity from the previous rounds.
They'll know in a few weeks if the chemo is doing any good. Regardless, the outlook is not good. I just don't want the guy to suffer. You always kow this time will come but its pretty hard to deal with. My folks are in Florida which makes it worse.
Make sure you guys get regular check-ups, cancer is a lot easier to deal with when its caught early. My Dad's wasnt.
Not sure why Im sharing this but Im sure others have gone through this and it feels good to get it off my chest.
jim

fishweewee · 05-19-2005, 08:19 AM

I'm sorry to hear that Jim. I will say a prayer for your father and your family. Sounds like he is a fighter - hope he keeps up his strength.

JohnR · 05-19-2005, 08:24 AM

Very sorry to hear that. While cancer has stricken my family before it was in older generations. But I have seen it's effect on people I know and respect. I will say that I am constantly amazed at what strength and willpower do in the individuals fight against cancer. Your family has my best wishes.

partsjay · 05-19-2005, 08:31 AM

Prayers for you and your family.

rwilhelm · 05-19-2005, 08:33 AM

Jim I am sorry to hear this. I wish you Dad well and will say a prayer for him. Hopefully one day they will find a cure for cancer. My cousin is battling cancer right now and he is only 31.

reelecstasy · 05-19-2005, 08:46 AM

Very sorry your family has to go thru this. He sounds like he is a fighter and that is what it takes to get thru something so terrible. When I was 17 one of my best friends, who was also my god mothers son fought the fight for 2 years. It is a terrible heart breaking thing to go through. When he didn't have strength he looked to those around him for it, and he got it thru us all. Be strong and have faith. My prayers and thoughts go out to you and your family. It is a good thing to talk and let some of it out, it helps give some peace inside....

fishsmith · 05-19-2005, 08:54 AM

Hang tough man, cancer does suck.

Mr. Sandman · 05-19-2005, 09:21 AM

RIJ.. I am very saddened to hear this. I am all too familiar with cancer (as are many people). My mom died at 47, my dad re-married 10 years later, she then died (in her 50's) and then my dad retired early, moved to the cape to fish and he died at 63, all from cancer. My wife is a general surgeon who for many years started and ran a breast wellness clinic. I can't tell you how many dear friends, collegues, family and people I have met that have been eaten up by cancer. I figure it is going to get me too someday. (Based on the average age of my parents death, I figure I have 7 more years left…although my wife says it does not work out quite like that). In large part, that is why I changed my life from one of work-work-work and materialism to one of quality lifestyle spent with my family. My only advice is to spend as much time with your family as possible, it is really all you have when you think about it.

God Bless.

Clammer · 05-19-2005, 09:21 AM

Jim ,Hang in there for him , it sucks but no other choices /P & T are with you & your family / live each day hard , [ENJOY} you family ,sunset,fishing, memories,[sp] , laugh as much as you can ,kid with your dad -if you can ,,
Yes ,Cancer really @#$%^&* sucks ////

RIJIMMY · 05-19-2005, 09:54 AM

Thanks for all the kind words. I have spoken with my Dad every single day since last October. I try my best to be upbeat and even last night we were still joking. I know it will hurt him to see us suffer so I try my best to keep doing things normally. He really enjoys my weekly fishing reports.
I just hope whatever happens, happens painlessly and peacfully. Its tough to see a guy who prided himself on being in good shape be reduced to barely being able to walk.
It definitly makes you rethink things. My grandfather died at 57, my Dad will be 64 this Saturday. Im 35, thats not a whole lot of time. Health -wise, my Dad did most things right so I think it comes down to the genes.
Thanks again

piemma · 05-19-2005, 09:54 AM

I was diagnosed with bladder cancer on april 9th of this year. they operated and I go back for another look see on July 13th. Till then I'm fishing as much as I can.

FishermanTim · 05-19-2005, 10:05 AM

My dad past from lung/brain cancer. The worst part was that had he been seeing a doctor for regular checkups, it could possibly been caught in time.
Unfortunately, he was a chain smoker for decades, and NEVER went to the doctor. I have made it a point to keep up with regular checkups, and trying, and I do mean trying to maintain a healthier lifestyle. You know, eating healthier, exercise more regularly (besides fishing). What sucks even more is when cancer hits someone who didn't lead a risky lifestyle. I have a friend who doesn't smoke, drink much, and WAS relatively healthy, until he had a heart attack at 31. After a quadruple bypass, he thought the worst was over, but now he has a brain tumor that has slowly taking away his eyesight, and will then take his mobility, and eventually could take his life. He had surgery to try and save his vision, but it was unsuccessful. (I went to visit him the day before and he seemed to be handling it quite well.

All in all, cancer sucks worst when you can't explain why it developed in a healthy person. I know family history can play a part, but it still hurts.
The best thing you could do is keep his spirits up. Laughter is a very good medicine. Good luck, and we'll pray for him.

ProfessorM · 05-19-2005, 10:15 AM

Sorry to hear it. Hard to understand why sometimes. Live everyday to the fullest you never know. I will pray for you and keep a positive outlook. P. M.

Swimmer · 05-19-2005, 11:29 AM

Jimmy I will say a prayer for his recovery. It work for my wife eight years ago. It is a horrendous experience for all involved. I remember the talks my wife and I had about the treatments available and how she would proceed. As much as we talked I had absolutely no control over any of it. What took place ultimately was that every decision was made by wife, because it was her body and her life and she had to do what made the most sense to her. She works in medical field and runs all those blood test for doctors and their patients, so she understand their meanings. Which meant that she new exactly what was happening to her. Whether the test results and their meanings helped Bev emotionally or not I'm not sure. It can't hurt I guess. My point is that you and your dad probably feel that same way. You do not any control over what is taking place and thats very disheartening. Keep your chin up regardless and I'll say a prayer for you also.

vineyardblues · 05-19-2005, 11:46 AM

I am very sorry to here this bad news, I understand what your going tru because I lost my dad the same way. They say bladder cancer is the #1 in male deaths. I will say a prayer
VB

BigFish · 05-19-2005, 12:12 PM

I lost a brother to Lukemia....he was 5 and I was 9 months old. I always felt robbed of the chance to get to know him......cancer is the nastiest, most miserable disease on this planet as far as I am concerned. My best wishes to your Dad for better days, to your family also and to you Jim.

GaryK2 · 05-19-2005, 01:26 PM

I am sorry to hear that Jimmy. I wish your dad well. I lost a good friend to bladder cancer a few years back. Hang in there, and make him as comfortable as possible, both emotionally and physically.

Diamond Tackle · 05-19-2005, 03:07 PM

Im sorry to hear about your dads illlness. I will say a prayer for him and your family. Be strong and live life to its fullest each day cause youre right our time here is short,so we have to enjoy our family while they are with us.
Hopefully Someday soon we will wipe out this scurge of a disease once and for all.

Fishpart · 05-19-2005, 03:32 PM

Nebe · 05-19-2005, 03:43 PM

bummer.. if you can, get him up here for a little low impact surfcasting. who knows it could make him better.

Rappin Mikey · 05-19-2005, 05:13 PM

Stay strong. I'll be praying.

Raven · 05-19-2005, 05:25 PM

lost my mom to leukemia.... and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.......Cancer is so hard to fight as its your own cells fighting you.
All i can say is....if you want to remember (preserve) your family history, now is the time to ask you dad about the old days....as there are things he knows that no one else will remember. hang in there man.

Surfcastinglife · 05-19-2005, 10:29 PM

lost my grandfather to cancer when i was 3. my dad still tells me stories of how i was his "favorite" grandson. like bigfish, always felt robbed of the chance to know him, would've gotten along well with him, judging by my relationship with my dad. hope things go well for your dad jimmy.

Rob Rockcrawler · 05-20-2005, 01:20 AM

Thoughts and prayers. My mom has emphasema right now and is going to be getting a transplant in about 2 months. I know its different but im feeling a bit of the same things i imagine. Just telling my mom that i love her and all that mushy stuff makes me feel better and i know it does the same for her.

FishermanTim · 05-20-2005, 10:57 AM

My father passed 4 yrs ago, and his brother passed earlier this year.
I had been asked years back if I wanted to join my mother, father, aunts and uncles for a family luncheon. I did not know what the reason was, I just wanted to me some of my relatives that I don't get to see that often.
As it turns out, it was a surprise for my father's older brother. He hadn't seen his brothers and sister together in DECADES, and he didn't know they were going to join his group (his younger brother and sister-in-law and himself).
This was quite a memorable lunch.
I hail from a family of 9 kids, and oddly enough, when my dad was ill, and the end was eminent, my other siblings all made efforts to "make their peace" with dad while they could. I, on the otherhand, spent MANY hours fishing (trout) with dad down the cape, and spent almost as much time talking and playing cribbage while listening to the Sox on the radio. Those are some of my most treasured memories of my dad.
(I already have plans to introduce my nieces and nephews to the world of fishing.)
Hope and pray for the best, and treasure the time you have.

Saltheart · 05-20-2005, 12:20 PM

I hope things turn out well for everyone fighting health problems.

Goose · 05-21-2005, 06:34 PM

Prayer Works!