girl solo sailor epibs went off this AM

[Nebe]

yeah i would have gotten seasick, but it only lasts for 2 days then i am fine

[Jim in CT]

Eben, I have been on sailboats maybe 5 times in my life, so I can't claim any technical knowledge. I'll assume that at 16, you and likwid had the technical sailing skills to handle most situations.

That you "could" have done it at 16 is not the same thing as saying it would have been a good idea. That's where parents are supposed to step in, because the extra wisdom and experience that parents are supposed to have, enables them to differentiate between what's possible, and what's advisable.

I have a 15 year-old. I could kick her out of the house, and she could get a job somewhere and make enough to pay her rent and buy food. And even though there are times when I'm sure that idea is appealing to her (every time I say "no"), I wouldn't let her do it. It would not be in her best interests, it would not improve her chances of having a fulfilling future. She may not agree with that, but I know it for a fact. I know that, and she doesn't, because I'm more mature and more experienced than she is.

Finally, how long does it take to sail around the world solo? A few months? I'd question the saity of any parent who could be without their 16 year-old for that long, under any circumstances.

This is all just my $0.02 obviously. Maybe reasonable people can disagree, but I don't see it. I can usually see both sides of any issue, but not here. Rarely do I see things as obviously right or wrong, but this is to me.

Anyway, you do know how to disagree respectfully, and that's rare. And I envy your vast marine experience, I'm pretty new to all this.

God Bless.

[Jim in CT]

Eben, continuing on the "just cuz you could do it, doesn't mean I'll let you do it" theme...

My 15 year old daughter goes to a private school, and is really into classical music. Her music class wanted to do an UNSUPERVISED, OVERNIGHT trip to NYC (to see 3 concerts over 2 days). Again, these were high school sophomores, unsupervised.

Now, my daughter is pefrectly capable of getting on a train, getting off at the right stop, walking to a hotel, feeding herself, finding the concert, etc...There was no one skill required that she doesn't have. That being said, never in a million years would I have ever let her do it. Buit there were parents who said OK. I was simply stunned.

Too over-protective for you? You seem very thoughtful, so I'm curious what your opinion is...

[Nebe]

Originally Posted by Jim in CT

Eben, continuing on the "just cuz you could do it, doesn't mean I'll let you do it" theme...

My 15 year old daughter goes to a private school, and is really into classical music. Her music class wanted to do an UNSUPERVISED, OVERNIGHT trip to NYC (to see 3 concerts over 2 days). Again, these were high school sophomores, unsupervised.

Now, my daughter is pefrectly capable of getting on a train, getting off at the right stop, walking to a hotel, feeding herself, finding the concert, etc...There was no one skill required that she doesn't have. That being said, never in a million years would I have ever let her do it. Buit there were parents who said OK. I was simply stunned.

Too over-protective for you? You seem very thoughtful, so I'm curious what your opinion is...

My thoughts are that there will be a time in your life where you will have to let go of your daughter. The earlier you allow your child to think on his/her own, the stronger person that they will grow to be. Some learn by experience, some learn by failure. The longer you hold your daugther by the reigns, the more you risk extreme failure later on.. For example.. When you see college kids going nuts at spring weekend down south, binge drinking and acting wild, I guarantee you that these people are people who were actively held back in their early teens. Like I said, I grew up on boats- my family would rent out our house in the summer and we would live on our 60 foot steel ketch, but when i was in highschool, I was trusted by my parents to run free.. my friends and I all drank on the weekends, and we all hung out with the local colllege kids... when it was time for me to go to college, I felt like a grad student. I watched all of my peers go crazy because this was their first taste of freedom..
My point is that when parents dont let their kids think for themselves, they are in effect, not letting their kids learn how to think.

getting back to sailing around the world... The first person to sail around the world alone at a young age was Robin Lee Grahm.. he was my idol as a child. While other kids worshiped football players, i was thinking that I could have done what he had done.. he wasn't `16 though.. i think he was a bit older.

[Nebe]

What i want to know about this girl is how much experience did she have before she set off on this trip? what sort of long distance sailing did she have before this? If its not much, i will agree with you guys that this is irresponsible. If she has grown up on the water and has a lot fo bluewater sailing under her belt, i say kudos to her.

I just hope she is OK

[numbskull]

Originally Posted by Nebe

My thoughts are that there will be a time in your life where you will have to let go of your daughter. The earlier you allow your child to think on his/her own, the stronger person that they will grow to be. Some learn by experience, some learn by failure.

Actually, kids learn primarily by example.