I hate your kids!!

[Saltheart]

Would you like to go to Chateau de Fancy Restaurant with us Saturday night? Yes that would be nice We want a quiet night so no kids allowed Oh , we want to bring the kids Sorry , no kids. Maybe we can go to Burger King with the kids another night. Too bad you can't make it Saturday. Bye!

[FishermanTim]

Order the most expensive meals you want and then tell them that the tab will be split 6 ways, not 4, and that they have to pick up 4 portions. If they protest, or start with the "but they're just kids" speech, tell them that since they have come to (probably) every dinner with them that they will be considered part of the paying party.

(Of course there's always BK or Mc D's.)