How would he know what he was missing?

[JohnR]

OK - here is another of the very few of the 300 e-mails I get everyday... Please no nastygrams . I'm just forwarding ths jokes


How would he know what he was missing?

A new monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old texts by hand. He notices, however, that they are copying copies, not the original books. So, the new monk goes to the head monk to ask him about this. He points out that if there were an error in the first copy, that error would be continued in all of the other copies. The head monk says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son." So, he goes down into the cellar with one of the copies to check it against the original. Hours later, nobody has seen him.

So, one of the monks goes downstairs to look for him. He hears a sobbing coming from the back of the cellar, and finds the old monk leaning over one of the original books crying. He asks the old monk what's wrong, and in a choked voice came the reply...

"The word is 'celebrate'."

[chris L]

this is the cleanest of my daily bulk of jokes !

These three guys were sitting behind three nuns at an football game. The men felt
hampered by the nuns, and decided to antagonize the nuns, to get them to move.
The first guy says to the others in a loud voice," I think I want to move to California, there are only 100 Catholics living there." The second guy speaks up and says, "I'm gonna move to Washington, there are only 50 Catholics living there." The third guy speaks up and says, "I want to move to Idaho, there are only 5 Catholics living there."

At that point, one of the nuns turns around, locks eyes with the third guy, and calmly says...
"Why don't you go to hell, there aren't any Catholics there!"

and one more
The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?" No one answered until little Mary stood up, angry, and said,
"You should not be asking 6th graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then
fire you!" With a sneer on her face, she then sat back down. Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, "Which body part increases to
10 times its size when stimulated?" Little Mary's mouth fell open; then she said to those around her, "Boy, is she gonna get in big trouble!" The
teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, "Anybody?"
Finally,
Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, "The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye."
Mrs. Parks said, "Very good, Billy," then turned to Mary and continued, "As for you, young lady, I have three things to say:
(1) you have a dirty mind,
(2) you didn't read your homework, and
(3) one day you are going to be very, very disappointed."