DEAR ABBY - Striper Talk Striped Bass Fishing, Surfcasting, Boating

UserRemoved1 · 12-07-2008, 06:36 AM

Dear Abby,
My neighbors dog keeps using my entire yard as his personal dumping grounds. My family has stepped in more dog doodoo in the last year than OPEC has oil. They continually let the dog run loose even with a leash law in town and my wife has spoken to them numerous times. We know it's their dog because we've seen it happen numerous times and keep having to shoo the dog out of the yard.

Yesterday I was doing the last yard cleanup of the season and there was a fresh mound. I told my wife to grab a shovel out of the garage and throw it in the middle of the street. Instead she grabbed a shovel and walked across the street and threw it all over the top of their driveway. I told her not to but she was pissed. Their kids saw her do it and went and told daddy. Of course he was not too thrilled and came over and yelled at my wife.

My 13 year old wants to start bagging it and putting it in their mailbox but I'm afraid it will make our mailbox stink because it's right next to it and Uncle Sam will come looking to lock me up the first time they find an IED inside the mailbox.

I heard about this guy on the cape that put this cool fence up on his property that kept everyone out. Do you think I could put one in the middle of the street?

HELP what would you do?

Backbeach Jake · 12-07-2008, 06:40 AM

Take this morning's newspaper, a cup of coffee and make yourself comfy on his front steps. Don't forget the Charmin.

spence · 12-07-2008, 06:52 AM

Sounds like there's a loose mutt in town. Call Animal Control

-spence

Jenn · 12-07-2008, 09:30 AM

find something to feed the dog that will give it the sh^%$s! ,send it home and pray when it happens they cant get him outside quick enough and have to clean it off the carpet.......

or tie a paper baggie full of the collected dog poo to the dog's collar and send it home with a present for its owners.

oooh better yet send spot home after fragrancing him in Buck Lure

Duke41 · 12-07-2008, 09:49 AM

Call animal control and try not to blame the dog. I would be super pissed too.

Swimmer · 12-07-2008, 10:05 AM

Use the shovel to throw it back in the jerks yard.

The Dad Fisherman · 12-07-2008, 10:11 AM

I'd second animal control...maybe after he has to pay to get his pooch back a couple of times he'll get the message.

Dog crap in the car door handles is always a classic too....

Joe · 12-07-2008, 10:12 AM

When I was a kid the people next door to us had a barking dog that went on forever. Then it was gone. My Mom is like 79 - the topic came up at Thanksgiving a few years back - we wondering what happened to the dog. My Mom said, "Oh, I threw him a meatball."

Grapenuts · 12-07-2008, 11:57 AM

slingshot with marbles....they learn reel fast that this yard bites back and they go elsewhere to crap.

MAC · 12-07-2008, 03:14 PM

It's Christmas time. Fill a box with it. Wrap said box and put a nice bow on it. Then place box on their doorstep with a card saying "Merry Christmas".

Or just buy a paintball gun and go dog sniping.

UserRemoved1 · 12-07-2008, 04:05 PM

Do they make laxitives for dogs you can buy at a pet store?

striperman36 · 12-07-2008, 05:17 PM

ex-lax tablet in hamburger

my dog get serious runs on eating cheapo pigs ears. it's like explosive and sudden in nature when it happens . the dog may be inside and whammo instant new wallboard

UserRemoved1 · 12-07-2008, 05:25 PM

cooked or raw

I could see leaving a few meatballs around some trees

Sgt_Nutz · 12-07-2008, 07:45 PM

I am most anxious to see the x-lax method put into practice and eagerly await hearing about the results!!

A stop at the selectman's office and a subsequent visit from the animal control officer worked once for me.

striperman36 · 12-07-2008, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by #^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&#^&

cooked or raw

I could see leaving a few meatballs around some trees

Whatever the dog eats and you can wrap around the tablet

UserRemoved1 · 12-07-2008, 07:56 PM

I'm gonna have every living animal in the neighborhood running around with the squirts by the time I'm done.

This could get real ugly

striperman36 · 12-07-2008, 07:59 PM

Just the carnivores.
I think just calling the dog over and giving a nice little treat would be create.
Oh and give it an Alka Seltzer tab too, so then its foaming at the mouth

Nebe · 12-07-2008, 08:59 PM

poison the child. They will move and take the dog with them.

UserRemoved1 · 12-08-2008, 05:10 AM

omg I think I just stained myself laughing Bill and Eben

Nebe · 12-08-2008, 07:37 AM

My ex girfriend's parents dog once ate a pair of panty hose.. I have never seen anything so hillarious when it tried to crap it out..it was hanging out by about a foot and the dog was running in circles trying to pull it out.. i guess you had to see it to really understand the bizarreness of it.

Crafty Angler · 12-08-2008, 10:25 AM

You can't blame the dog - he's just doing what dogs do.

It's the owners fault - and he may be trying to get your goat, Salty.

If it were me, I'd go over and pinch a beaut on his front steps and then ring the bell to ask if he could spare a little TP...

I dunno...I guess diplomacy has never been my strong suit

The Dad Fisherman · 12-08-2008, 10:31 AM

when spring gets here Go out under cover of dark an piss the same message in his lawn over and over until it burns into the lawn...

FishermanTim · 12-08-2008, 11:17 AM

Maybe toss some meat scraps and doggie treats on HIS lawn, that way HIS dog and every other carnivore in the area will make a b-line for the treats.

Or (if it were possible) get canine estrus (dog in heat) lure and spray the dog. That will drive every male in town to his doorstop, and whether his dog is female or not, they'll all try to mount him/here.
"It's a doggy tow-truck!"

TheSpecialist · 12-08-2008, 11:49 PM

When the dog comes in the yard to do the business, feed him, entice him into the garage. If he has a collar with tags remove it. Now call animal control, report that the dog was in your yard, no tags and you don't know who owns it. Let them take the dog away.

YOu could always feed it some boneless buffalo wings...

UserRemoved1 · 12-09-2008, 05:11 AM

Anyone know if I can get in trouble for putting them even at the edge of their driveway?

I'd never ever do anything to hurt an animal but hey I gotta say there sure is some pisser ideas here...Karl my wife is reading this thread now too and I know she likes the idea of the picture and the bag. I might take it one step further and start having everyone put it in a box...wait til there's a few pounds...then ship it to them ups...

"Maybe toss some meat scraps and doggie treats on HIS lawn, that way HIS dog and every other carnivore in the area will make a b-line for the treats.

Or (if it were possible) get canine estrus (dog in heat) lure and spray the dog. That will drive every male in town to his doorstop, and whether his dog is female or not, they'll all try to mount him/here.
"It's a doggy tow-truck!""

gone fishin · 12-09-2008, 12:23 PM

I had a similar ( but just as aggrevating) problem with a neighbors dog. He would put the hound (black lab)out at 4:30 am every day to do his craping etc. He wouldn't allow the mut in until 7:30 am. The dog would start barking non stop to get in and he would ignore it. Besides crapping in my yard, the barking became aggrivating as we didn't have to get up that early. I discoverd the dog was terrified of firecrackers, large or small. One morning in the summer the dog did his thing and I scooped it up and tied it to his collar. I lit a couple of firecrackers and the dog took off for his home, and when his master didn't let the mut in, he scratched through the sreen door on his slider. The neighbor knew exactly who did the deed as I had words with him over his dog, but never left his dog out again! Mission accomplished!

OLD GOAT · 12-09-2008, 02:09 PM

My 87 year old mom picked up and put it on a pie tin,walked over ,rang the bell and when the door opened said this is for you. End of story

sean curry · 12-11-2008, 07:13 AM

Salty,

Get a low powered Daisy red rider BB gun and give him a shot in the rump. It will not break the skin, but will feel like a bee sting. After a few times, the dog will learn to stay away from your yard.

When I was a kid, my brothers and I would wear my Dad's fencing helmets and shoot it out all the time.....hope my son never hears this story.

sean

fishaholic18 · 12-11-2008, 08:32 AM

I would have let you borrow her...but sadly she passed..No animal was safe in my yard,,

Gary · 12-14-2008, 08:33 PM

Don't ask how I know this, but MSG (Monosodium Glutamate) when wet smells like a female dog in heat to dogs that is. Copious amounts of this around the offending neighbor's property will attract every stray male dog in the neighborhood.

It realy is not the dog's falt.

But if you feel it is get some PICKLED Habanero peppers, fresh ones do not work as well and grind them up and mix them with some old hamburger or whatevers clever, the offending mut will have exploding a$$hole syndrom

Or to end the pooch, take an industrial sponge, wet it and ball it up with string and let it dry soak it in hot bacon grease, let it cool, remove the string. I don't need to explain the rest.