Jokes...

[Katie]

Okay i found some jokes okay... so i'll put some up... Hope ya like'em...

DON'T BREAK THE EGGS.

A traveling salesman was driving down a farm road when his car suddenly stopped and wouldn't start again. A farmer on a tractor was passing by and stopped to help the salesman fix his car. By the time they were finished, it was almost sundown, so the farmer told the salesman he could spend the night at his home if he didn't mind sharing the bed with his twin daughters. The salesman thought the twins were kids, so he said it was okay. They farmer took the salesman to his home and went into the house.

After a few minutes of talking and cleaning up, the men were called to the dinner table by the farmer's wife. As they sat down, the salesman saw the two most beautiful young ladies he had ever seen. The farmer introduced them as his twin daughters. During the entire meal all the salesman thought about was he was sleeping in the same bed as the girls and he was going to have a good time that night. They all finished their supper and the men went and talked while the women finished cleaning up. The salesman couldn't keep his mind off what was to be a good time. Finally it was time to go to bed and the salesman anxiously got prepared. The twins got into the bed, one on each side of the salesman. Just as the lights were going to be turned off, the farmer came into the bedroom and placed one egg on both sides of the salesman. The farmer said, "This is to make sure you don't do anything with my daughters tonight!! If I come in tomorrow morning and find one or both eggs broken, I'll know you did something and I'll shoot you!! You understand? Well, the salesman looked at the eggs, the farmer, and the shotgun in the farmer's hand and quietly replied that he understood. With that, the farmer told them goodnight and turned off the light.

During the night, the salesman turned over and accidently broke one of the eggs. "What the hell," he thought, "I'm dead anyway," and screwed the first twin. After several minutes of bliss, he rolled off of her and broke the other egg. "Might as well go out smiling," he thought and had his way with the second twin. When he was finished, he noticed that it was almost sunup and the farmer was starting to stir. Thinking quickly, he looked into his sales bag and got out a tube of superglue and glued the eggs back together. The glue dried quick and the salesman jumped back into the bed and had just put both eggs back when the farmer entered.

"I see the eggs are alright, so I guess I won't shoot you. Want some breakfast?"

"What are you making?" the salesman asked.

Holding up the eggs, he said, "Eggs."

"No thanks, I'll eat later, I gotta get going!!!" the salesman quickly said and grabbed his clothes and left.

The farmer went to the stove and broke the first egg over the skillet, but nothing came out. He then broke the second egg and again, nothing came out. Extrememly pissed off, the farmer walked out to the hen house and shouted, "Alright...which one of you roosters is wearing a rubber???"