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StriperTalk! All things Striper |
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02-03-2010, 08:58 PM
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: To close to water for my insanity
Posts: 884
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A good laugh on me
Well I know some you dont ice fish and can't wait wait for the spring return of our beloved striped-bass...so instead of a whole bunch of ice caught fish, Im going to put my self out there and tell you guys a funny story....I dont think I have ever posted this here so please be gental ..lol...This is a true story and one i will never forget.....Keep in mind at the time I was trying to be cute and funny to impress my now wife to be. I hope some of you will still fish with me...lol........ About 9 years ago my parents made a trip to Cuba for a month in half. My niese who was pregnant at the time had come to stay with me at the house, so I could help her. Well at the time My girl friend (fiance now)was spending alot of time at the house with me and had just stayed over about 4 nights in row. I got up one morning to go fishing & I had to give her a ride back to her dorm before I went. That night when I returned back home I took a shower and laid on my bed. I noticed a tube of Udder cream. So I started to read it. I had never heard of it before so I kind of thought to my self it belonged to my girl. Thinking how soft her nipples are and how funny it would be if I tried it, I said to myself it cant hurt to try. So for the next 3 nights I was putting Udder cream on my nipples. I have to tell you that crap works, I probably had the softest nipples of any man.. Well night #4 my girl comes over and I had just gotten out of the shower. So im putting on the cream & I turn to her & say I hope you don't mind i've been using your cream. At the same time she's looking at me like what are you doing. Then she says that's not mine ( now keep in mind that at the begining of our relationship things were a little rocky with me working at a hair salon next to BU and dating about 6 girls. So now I have to explain how this nipple cream got into my room with out me bringing home another girl. So I start to think and finally come up with maybe it's my nieces, she's been staying here and she's pregnant so it makes sence. That night when she gets home I ask her and she has no idea where the Udder cream had come from or even heard of it. Now im confused because I hadn't brought anyone over and I had no clue how this cream got on my bed. My girl still thinks im cheating. Well about two weeks later I was at the salon working and this girl had her boobs done and was showing them to me. I had felt one and she said aren't they soft. So of course I say yes, but not as soft as my nipple. So at this point there was about 3 girls in the salon all feeling on my nipples going wow they are soft when my brother walks in from the rest room. One girl say's to him pepe are your nipples as soft as your brothers and say I dont think so I've been using Udder cream on mine. My brother turns around and looks at me and says what. Now everyone is laughing, so I go ahead and tell the story. When my brother says I put that on your bed. I know how bad your hands get from fishing and that stuff woirk wounders on them. Okay go head & take all the shots you want. I still think it was funny & i bet my nipples are softer then all of yours.......to be young again.
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offthehookfishing.com
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02-03-2010, 09:07 PM
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#2
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BigFish Bait Co.
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hanover
Posts: 23,392
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You....ahem......used to work in a salon? 
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Almost time to get our fish on!!!
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02-03-2010, 09:14 PM
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#3
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: To close to water for my insanity
Posts: 884
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BigFish
You....ahem......used to work in a salon? 
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lol...my brothers...I use to manage it...best time of my life.......it was next door to BU and the girls were plenty...it was like a candy store...much, much better odds then the canal
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offthehookfishing.com
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02-03-2010, 09:20 PM
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#4
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Old Guy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Mansfield, MA
Posts: 8,760
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the things we give up in later life. Dude what a friggin trip
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02-03-2010, 09:20 PM
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#5
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Quincy Ma.
Posts: 54
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good story!! so how soft were the girls boobs, ya Im nosey, at first I was ohoh were are we going with story it was giveing me bad thoughs lol...Jim
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02-03-2010, 09:28 PM
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#6
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Eels
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Cape Cod,MA.
Posts: 3,333
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Dude thats awesome!
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Live bait sharp hooks and timing is all you need
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02-04-2010, 12:18 AM
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,939
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So you rubbed Sh$%T on your nipples? More than once? It's late right now but I think I understand but maybe not. WTF??
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02-04-2010, 05:16 AM
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#8
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........
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 22,805
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if your nipples got stuck in a machine or were being yanked by a farmers wife or better yet his rough hands every morning
to obtain milk for breakfast you'd comprehend why they need
some softening agents...but still i wonder whats in it.?
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02-04-2010, 06:11 AM
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#9
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Moderator
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Marshfield, MA
Posts: 6,267
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this is udderly hilarious...... 
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02-04-2010, 07:28 AM
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#10
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: cape cod when my meds r workin right
Posts: 1,412
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why do u think its called utter butter,u got to whip it up to make cream,trust me ........stiff tip.... btw..hairdresser next to bu???? you are my HERO 
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02-04-2010, 07:38 AM
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#11
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Certifiable Intertidal Anguiologist
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Somewhere between OOB & west of Watch Hill
Posts: 35,270
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Hehehehe - and she still doesn't believe you...
Quote:
Originally Posted by RoyL
lol...my brothers...I use to manage it...best time of my life.......it was next door to BU and the girls were plenty...it was like a candy store...much, much better odds then the canal
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Know what you mean, I worked door at BU's favorite dive bar and another bar frequented by BU/BC/Locals
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~Fix the Bait~ ~Pogies Forever~
Striped Bass Fishing - All Stripers
Kobayashi Maru Election - there is no way to win.
Apocalypse is Coming:
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02-04-2010, 08:57 AM
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#12
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Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Middleboro MA
Posts: 17,125
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You googan you 
well if we can't laugh at ourselves, what the heck
good story
you won't live this down 
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02-04-2010, 09:04 AM
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#13
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BuzzLuck
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Brockton
Posts: 6,414
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Did you use the Udder cream alone or in combination with a hair removal products, Hair Removal - Remove Unwanted Hair With Our Gels, Creams, Scrubs & More - Nads.com ? I think I would have a hard time getting smooth nipples due to excessive chest hair!
I am only endorsing the "nads" you had in posting this thread.
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 Given the diversity of the human species, there is no “normal” human genome sequence. We are all mutants.
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02-04-2010, 09:07 AM
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#14
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Hunting for a 40
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: RI
Posts: 615
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Good story...............................but please don't go into details about how you use "Bag Balm" 
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02-04-2010, 09:09 AM
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#15
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: North Fork
Posts: 2,260
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RoyL
lol...my brothers...I use to manage it...best time of my life.......it was next door to BU and the girls were plenty...it was like a candy store...much, much better odds then the canal
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When i go to the canal i am hunting cows.....   
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Originally Posted by Flaptail
"Throw plugs like we do that will cause them to suffer humility. Pogies make any fisherman look good when bass are around. Bait is easy."
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02-04-2010, 09:21 AM
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#16
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My brother is bald
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Parts Unknown
Posts: 4,516
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Is it OK if I start calling you The Zohan?
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seals + plovers =
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02-04-2010, 11:18 AM
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#17
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Hyde Park, MA
Posts: 4,152
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xyzs
good story!! so how soft were the girls boobs, ya Im nosey, at first I was ohoh were are we going with story it was giveing me bad thoughs lol...Jim
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Or nightmares.....Man-boobs....EEEEWWW!
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02-04-2010, 08:55 PM
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#18
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Afterhours Custom Plugs
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: R.I.
Posts: 8,642
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good that you only put it on your nipplets..... 
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02-04-2010, 09:08 PM
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#19
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: To close to water for my insanity
Posts: 884
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see I told you all, you'd have a good laugh......but im sure all that know me are going to let me live it down.....and yes I will be working the shows with soft nipples...lol
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offthehookfishing.com
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02-05-2010, 06:08 AM
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#20
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: weymouth
Posts: 1,360
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RoyL
Well I know some you dont ice fish and can't wait wait for the spring return of our beloved striped-bass...so instead of a whole bunch of ice caught fish, Im going to put my self out there and tell you guys a funny story....I dont think I have ever posted this here so please be gental ..lol...This is a true story and one i will never forget.....Keep in mind at the time I was trying to be cute and funny to impress my now wife to be. I hope some of you will still fish with me...lol........ About 9 years ago my parents made a trip to Cuba for a month in half. My niese who was pregnant at the time had come to stay with me at the house, so I could help her. Well at the time My girl friend (fiance now)was spending alot of time at the house with me and had just stayed over about 4 nights in row. I got up one morning to go fishing & I had to give her a ride back to her dorm before I went. That night when I returned back home I took a shower and laid on my bed. I noticed a tube of Udder cream. So I started to read it. I had never heard of it before so I kind of thought to my self it belonged to my girl. Thinking how soft her nipples are and how funny it would be if I tried it, I said to myself it cant hurt to try. So for the next 3 nights I was putting Udder cream on my nipples. I have to tell you that crap works, I probably had the softest nipples of any man.. Well night #4 my girl comes over and I had just gotten out of the shower. So im putting on the cream & I turn to her & say I hope you don't mind i've been using your cream. At the same time she's looking at me like what are you doing. Then she says that's not mine ( now keep in mind that at the begining of our relationship things were a little rocky with me working at a hair salon next to BU and dating about 6 girls. So now I have to explain how this nipple cream got into my room with out me bringing home another girl. So I start to think and finally come up with maybe it's my nieces, she's been staying here and she's pregnant so it makes sence. That night when she gets home I ask her and she has no idea where the Udder cream had come from or even heard of it. Now im confused because I hadn't brought anyone over and I had no clue how this cream got on my bed. My girl still thinks im cheating. Well about two weeks later I was at the salon working and this girl had her boobs done and was showing them to me. I had felt one and she said aren't they soft. So of course I say yes, but not as soft as my nipple. So at this point there was about 3 girls in the salon all feeling on my nipples going wow they are soft when my brother walks in from the rest room. One girl say's to him pepe are your nipples as soft as your brothers and say I dont think so I've been using Udder cream on mine. My brother turns around and looks at me and says what. Now everyone is laughing, so I go ahead and tell the story. When my brother says I put that on your bed. I know how bad your hands get from fishing and that stuff woirk wounders on them. Okay go head & take all the shots you want. I still think it was funny & i bet my nipples are softer then all of yours.......to be young again.
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thats why they call it fishing not catching
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02-05-2010, 12:15 PM
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#21
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 492
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someone give him a purple nurple.
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02-05-2010, 12:30 PM
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#22
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Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Marshfield
Posts: 2,608
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Dude that was friggin hilarious. We should call you Fabio now!
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"Sunshine Day Dream"
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02-05-2010, 01:34 PM
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#23
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Here fishy fishy
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Whoville
Posts: 2,266
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Were you moooooooooowing those 3 days Roy L?
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02-05-2010, 02:04 PM
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#24
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: North Kingstown, RI
Posts: 1,229
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Winter is closing in fast.
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02-05-2010, 02:07 PM
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#25
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 2,939
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I'm still laughing  Thanks
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02-05-2010, 09:48 PM
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#26
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Retired Surfer
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Sunset Grill
Posts: 9,511
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This is udder nonsense.
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Swimmer a.k.a. YO YO MA
Serial Mailbox Killer/Seal Fisherman
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02-05-2010, 10:18 PM
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#27
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,945
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Roy...that You???
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02-05-2010, 11:49 PM
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#28
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Hardcore Equipment Tester
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Abington, MA
Posts: 6,234
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Idon't know which part is better, you rubbing on the cream, or the fact that you were feeling up customers and they were feeling you back. I have a t shirt for you, CSI...... Certified Silicone Inspector..
What was the salon, not SJ Heads up?
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Bent Rods and Screaming Reels!
Spot NAZI
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