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| The Scuppers This is a new forum for the not necessarily fishing related topics... |
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04-13-2005, 05:01 AM
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#1
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Scuttlebutt
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Westport,MA
Posts: 2,433
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could always put laxitives in her coffee  ... did that to my english teacher is 6th grade.. worked perfectly.. he he pure evil |
Wasajigifying -[ was - a - jig-i-fy-ing] - the concept of not knowing what the hell your saying.
My Photography Page!
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04-13-2005, 05:27 AM
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#2
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: .
Posts: 5,935
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Her shoe collection would make wonderful chew toys for the family dog.
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04-13-2005, 05:56 AM
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#3
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Very Grumpy bay man
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 10,825
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Easy way to solve all marriage problems. refrigerator, wood stove, recliner, cable TV and porta potty all in the garage. been married 35+ years. Works for me.  |
No boat, back in the suds.  
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04-13-2005, 06:04 AM
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: North shore
Posts: 1,247
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All of the above...
Just don't plan on doing any "trolling" around the house.
You won't get any hits....
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04-13-2005, 06:45 AM
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#5
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Afterhours Custom Plugs
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: R.I.
Posts: 8,642
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mess with the scale.
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04-13-2005, 07:35 AM
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#6
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Super Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Georgetown MA
Posts: 18,204
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messin w/ the tampons might be going a little to far, I'm assuming you would like to KEEP your testicles after the battle is over. You might as well throw yourself in the Lion Cage wearing a Meat Suit, you'd have a better chance of survival that way.
Even I know there's 6 days a month I'm not messing w/ her.
If you want to piss her off, next time don't use ANY cutting board, do it right on the counter. then before you clean it up grab the newspaper for a little "Quality" time on the throne and let her look at it for 1/2 an hour. next time you use the wooden one she won't say "Boo"  |
"If you're arguing with an idiot, make sure he isn't doing the same thing."
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04-13-2005, 07:58 AM
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: South of Boston
Posts: 2,605
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by piemma
Easy way to solve all marriage problems. refrigerator, wood stove, recliner, cable TV and porta potty all in the garage. been married 35+ years. Works for me. |
I like Piemma's idea. If you have a "mantown" to retreat to, you can apologize for using the wrong board and sulk away. Thirty minutes later she'll be trying to snuggle up on the couch with you because she feels bad. |
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04-13-2005, 07:45 AM
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#8
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Princess of the Rocks
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: On the Rocks...
Posts: 328
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by fishweewee
Her shoe collection would make wonderful chew toys for the family dog.
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Thats the most evil thing I have ever heard of...I would kill someone if they did that to me...so in the end thats the best idea!
p.s. Tampons are definitely going way too far...she is already PMSing don't make it worse for yourself! |
Is There Anything Sexier Than A Hot Babe With A Bent Rod? ~RHern
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04-13-2005, 07:50 AM
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#9
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It's about respect baby!
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: ri
Posts: 6,358
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Just get 'er a new cutting board man..  |
Domination takes full concentration..
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04-13-2005, 11:04 AM
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#10
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Stuck In Reality
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Holden MA
Posts: 4,519
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by ThrowingTimber
Just get 'er a new cutting board man.. |
Yep that way she has no ammo and you can have the other one for fish.
Then cut the strings. |
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04-13-2005, 11:22 AM
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,945
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Insist she go buy a new spring outfit, hire somebody to watch the kids, if needed, go to the most expensive restaurant ya can find, buy her flowers... you will blow her mind.. but remember... it's the start of fishing season  consider it the "last supper"... put some in the cookie jar, then disappear. |
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04-13-2005, 11:29 AM
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#12
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Keep The Change
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Road to Serfdom
Posts: 3,275
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It's not worth fighting over a cutting board.....Retire to the mancave till it blows over.
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“It’s not up to the courts to invent new minorities that get special protections,” Antonin Scalia
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04-13-2005, 08:04 AM
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#13
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: .
Posts: 5,935
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Last week I attended an investment analyst conference hosted by a well-known publicly-traded consumer products company whose largest line of business is ... tampons.
I wasn't the only guy there. Plenty of portfolio managers and analysts were guys. The CEO and CFO of the company are guys. 
They were passing out a lot of free samples. I had a nice chat with the global head of tampons, and she told me all the wonderful dynamics of the market, including a treatise on why plastic applicators were gradually overtaking the cardboard segment, and why Tampax Pearl was taking market share away from their company. I got a goodie bag full of feminine hygiene product to give away at the office (you wouldn't believe how many requests I got for freebies).
Anyhoo, I had lunch with the head of R&D at said company. He told me that tampons are "Class II" medical devices regulated by the FDA.
I think if you pour some tabasco on a tampon which will be in contact with bleeding raw irritated tissue, you might be tampering with a medical device.
I think it would be better if you put some itching powder in the crotch of her panties instead. Better than a felony conviction. |
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04-13-2005, 08:04 AM
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#14
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Hardcore Equipment Tester
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Abington, MA
Posts: 6,234
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Teach her how to properly clean the cutting board. Takes a bunch of Kosher salt pour it on the board. Then cut a lemon in half, and scub the board with the lemon and Kosher salt together. The Kosher salt acts as an abrasive, and the lemon dissinfects the board. When you are done oil the board with Mineral oil, this seals it up nicely. Plastic cutting boards are very hard on your knives, and build up bacteria easily..
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Bent Rods and Screaming Reels!
Spot NAZI
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04-13-2005, 01:29 PM
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#15
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Outer Banks of Framingham
Posts: 434
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by TheSpecialist
Teach her how to properly clean the cutting board. Takes a bunch of Kosher salt pour it on the board. Then cut a lemon in half, and scub the board with the lemon and Kosher salt together. The Kosher salt acts as an abrasive, and the lemon dissinfects the board. When you are done oil the board with Mineral oil, this seals it up nicely. Plastic cutting boards are very hard on your knives, and build up bacteria easily..
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Hey, you watched Martha Stewart! Gottcha  |
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04-13-2005, 08:19 AM
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#16
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........
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 22,805
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afterhours
that's priceless ! 
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04-13-2005, 11:41 AM
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#17
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Seal Control
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Caver, Ma.
Posts: 3,875
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Rearrange the furniture while she is out!! |
"All my friends are Flakes!!"
BOATLESS 
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04-13-2005, 12:20 PM
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#18
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Maine
Posts: 4,547
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You guys are too funny Whatever you do be prepared for reprocussions. Ya might get itching powder in your undies.  |
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04-13-2005, 01:45 PM
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#19
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: .
Posts: 5,935
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by MAC
You guys are too funny Whatever you do be prepared for reprocussions. Ya might get itching powder in your undies. |
...or Nair.  |
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04-13-2005, 05:35 PM
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#20
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Moderator
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: 4 hours from my favorite place
Posts: 5,366
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."..she is already PMSing don't make it worse for yourself!"
Starfish....  guys just dont get it do they???? 
I must admit when my hubby puts on that sad face and APOLOGIZES I turn into complete mush. In fact there have been times his apology not only made me forgive him but made me feel horrible for being mad in the first place! |
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04-13-2005, 01:33 PM
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#21
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Libtardia
Posts: 21,694
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How about the ol' envirotex resin in the shampoo bottle and the hardner in the conditioner bottle trick???  |
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04-13-2005, 07:36 PM
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#22
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Got Necco's?
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Franklin
Posts: 1,339
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Eben
How about the ol' envirotex resin in the shampoo bottle and the hardner in the conditioner bottle trick??? |
Eben that reminds me of the Police Academy movie where they put superglue in captain harris' shampoo bottle, although envirotex is much more effective. |
HAMMER TIME! 
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04-14-2005, 01:58 PM
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#23
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It's about respect baby!
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: ri
Posts: 6,358
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did you apologize yet Ed? |
Domination takes full concentration..
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04-14-2005, 02:22 PM
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#24
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,595
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2 words for you.
Pocket Rocket
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