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Old 05-06-2003, 05:48 AM   #7
Fishpart
Keep The Change
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Road to Serfdom
Posts: 3,275
Bloo, I like it. Don't mean to hijack, but I got this from a friend today as well.

Sometimes we just need to Remember what the 12 Rules
of Life really are..
1. Never Give Yourself a Haircut After Three Margaritas.
2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40.
If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.
3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship
are "I apologize" and "you are right."
4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
5. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.
6. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her, believe them.
7. Learn to pick your battles:
Ask yourself, "Will this matter one year from now? How
about one month? One week? One day?"
8. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately.
It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.
9. If You Woke up Breathing, Congratulations! You have
another chance!
10. Living Well Really is The Best Revenge. Being miserable
because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the
other person was right about you.
11. Work is Good, but it's Not That Important.
Money is Nice, But You Can't Take It With You.
Statistics show most people don't live to spend all they saved,
some die even before they retire
And everything we have isn't really ours -- it was given to us by
God; He just lets us borrow it while we're here...even our kids.
12. And Finally ... Be Really Good To Your Family and/or Friends.
You never know when you are going to need them to empty your
bedpan.

“It’s not up to the courts to invent new minorities that get special protections,” Antonin Scalia
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